Charlie Oldphart
Member
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2005
- Messages
- 15
Dumb, dumber and dumbest!
Talking about mailboxes.
I had a son-in-law (now an ex-son-inlaw) that was so lazy you couldn't find a shovel to fit his hand anywhere. He wouln't work so he took up stealing.
At about 3 AM he and another pot head broke into someone's barn and was stealing chainsaws and other tools. The homeowner (farmer) heard the noise and put on the light just in time to see these clowns heading out of his drive and let go with two rounds with his 12 gauge. Dummy was driving a VW Rabitt (which I had given him) and in leaving the driveway he ran completely over the farmer's mailbox. Guess what. It tore the front license plate off and it was lying on the ground. It didn't take the cops too long to figure out who to talk to first--me--seeing that the car was registered in my name.
Anyway, we got it sorted out and Dummy got probation and psycological help. Wasn't that nice?
But my poor VW!! There were seven buckshot holes in the trunk, back window smashed and front windshield shattered. The damn insurance company wouldn't pay the claim saying it wasn't covered due to the vehicle was damaged during the commission of a crime!
When the farmer was questioned about shooting at a car he said that he didn't have his glasses on and heard a low growling sound (bad muffler) and was sure that a bear had attacked his sheep and was running off with it. Well, the cops sort of smiled and told him to be sure what he was shooting at next time. The old farmer said in his best Vermont accent "Don't think there will be a next time. Word gets around and I hear all the bears are heading south. Ayup.".
Anyway, I came out on the short end to the tune of about $1500 to fix the VW. I just wanted to fix the glass and leave the trunk with the holes in it. Great conversation starter! Wife says no way, so we fixed it.
If anyone starts a thread about "wannabes" I got another story about another ex son-in-law who has been in every war since 1812. Yup, you guessed it--same daughter==geeezz!
God Bless You and Yours.
Charlie
Talking about mailboxes.
I had a son-in-law (now an ex-son-inlaw) that was so lazy you couldn't find a shovel to fit his hand anywhere. He wouln't work so he took up stealing.
At about 3 AM he and another pot head broke into someone's barn and was stealing chainsaws and other tools. The homeowner (farmer) heard the noise and put on the light just in time to see these clowns heading out of his drive and let go with two rounds with his 12 gauge. Dummy was driving a VW Rabitt (which I had given him) and in leaving the driveway he ran completely over the farmer's mailbox. Guess what. It tore the front license plate off and it was lying on the ground. It didn't take the cops too long to figure out who to talk to first--me--seeing that the car was registered in my name.
Anyway, we got it sorted out and Dummy got probation and psycological help. Wasn't that nice?
But my poor VW!! There were seven buckshot holes in the trunk, back window smashed and front windshield shattered. The damn insurance company wouldn't pay the claim saying it wasn't covered due to the vehicle was damaged during the commission of a crime!
When the farmer was questioned about shooting at a car he said that he didn't have his glasses on and heard a low growling sound (bad muffler) and was sure that a bear had attacked his sheep and was running off with it. Well, the cops sort of smiled and told him to be sure what he was shooting at next time. The old farmer said in his best Vermont accent "Don't think there will be a next time. Word gets around and I hear all the bears are heading south. Ayup.".
Anyway, I came out on the short end to the tune of about $1500 to fix the VW. I just wanted to fix the glass and leave the trunk with the holes in it. Great conversation starter! Wife says no way, so we fixed it.
If anyone starts a thread about "wannabes" I got another story about another ex son-in-law who has been in every war since 1812. Yup, you guessed it--same daughter==geeezz!
God Bless You and Yours.
Charlie