Low life brother inlaw
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Mainsail
Member
Lock them in a safe, wear one.
Don't consider the gun to be a player in conflict resolution- if there is one call the cops right at the start.
Don't pull the gun unless you are completely committed to using it.
Don't consider the gun to be a player in conflict resolution- if there is one call the cops right at the start.
Don't pull the gun unless you are completely committed to using it.
leadaddict
Member
If I was that concerned about him, then he wouldn't be in my house. I'd much rather hurt a lot of feelings than put my family at risk.
You don't have a gun problem, or an ST&T problem. You have a marital problem. Someone you find threatening, who doesn't make you feel safe in your home, is allowed in anyway. I suggest talking to your wife in a discussion that's non-hostile and safety focused.
If I felt threatened in my home, I wouldn't be hiding the guns. I'd be retrieving them.
If I felt threatened in my home, I wouldn't be hiding the guns. I'd be retrieving them.
Dr. Sandman
Member
98f150-
Can please you be more specific with your description of your brother in law? How is he a scumbag? Why do you feel unsafe? Why is he coming to your house anyway? I think that answering these questions would get you some better advice. Dr. Sandman
Can please you be more specific with your description of your brother in law? How is he a scumbag? Why do you feel unsafe? Why is he coming to your house anyway? I think that answering these questions would get you some better advice. Dr. Sandman
bikerdoc
Moderator In Memoriam
A lot of groundwork things to do before you blow him away.
tell him he is not allowed in the house
If he shows up, call 911 and declare him a trespasser
if needed get a restraining order
I agree the is a stretch for S&T , but good luck.
tell him he is not allowed in the house
If he shows up, call 911 and declare him a trespasser
if needed get a restraining order
I agree the is a stretch for S&T , but good luck.
scaatylobo
Member
BIKER DOC - said it all
I am retired LEO and calling the police AFTER any confrontation happened means your on equal footing with him.
IF you let him in and he accuses you of being the perp,and not himself.
the laws are too complicated for me to give you ANY legal advise [ unless your in NYS,that I know well ] but before you think about allowing a PROBLEM known to you as one in your house = THINK ABOUT it carefully.
At very least the advise of wearing one and keeping the rest under LOCK & KEY [ think hard safe ] are what I would view.
BUT if this is a situation where you are SURE there will be a problem [ him looking for stuff to steal for drugs = example ] then AVOIDANCE is the first step.
I am retired LEO and calling the police AFTER any confrontation happened means your on equal footing with him.
IF you let him in and he accuses you of being the perp,and not himself.
the laws are too complicated for me to give you ANY legal advise [ unless your in NYS,that I know well ] but before you think about allowing a PROBLEM known to you as one in your house = THINK ABOUT it carefully.
At very least the advise of wearing one and keeping the rest under LOCK & KEY [ think hard safe ] are what I would view.
BUT if this is a situation where you are SURE there will be a problem [ him looking for stuff to steal for drugs = example ] then AVOIDANCE is the first step.
Sam1911
Moderator Emeritus
An ounce of prevention, here, is worth many thousands of pounds of misery later.
You literally think there's some likelihood that you will have to SHOOT your brother-in-law? So his "scumbag" habits aren't simply theft, or drug possession, tax evasion, jaywalking, or hanging with the wrong crowd then. You literally feel he will physically attack you and/or your wife in your home?
You need to be doing absolutely anything and everything to end the situation which is leading you down that path. Reduce or eliminate his visits. (Don't have to be confrontational about it. Lots of ways to be unavailable, not convenient, got other plans, etc.) Get your wife involved in this discussion. If he's that dangerous, she should be able to recognize that and help you reduce your exposure.
And when he is around, everything of value under lock and key, except for a carefully concealed weapon on your person.
You literally think there's some likelihood that you will have to SHOOT your brother-in-law? So his "scumbag" habits aren't simply theft, or drug possession, tax evasion, jaywalking, or hanging with the wrong crowd then. You literally feel he will physically attack you and/or your wife in your home?
You need to be doing absolutely anything and everything to end the situation which is leading you down that path. Reduce or eliminate his visits. (Don't have to be confrontational about it. Lots of ways to be unavailable, not convenient, got other plans, etc.) Get your wife involved in this discussion. If he's that dangerous, she should be able to recognize that and help you reduce your exposure.
And when he is around, everything of value under lock and key, except for a carefully concealed weapon on your person.
Then don't let him in your house.
There are plenty of black sheep out there that have been dropped from families and if you honestly believe that he might be a danger to you or your family he should not be allowed on the property.
This decision has to be made with your wife.
In my family, we spent years pretending that family members were OK, knowing that they were not. When we finally came to admit that they were not quality people (and I am talking about my family and my wife's as well) that we would not choose to associate with them if they were not family, then the choice to remove ourselves from their lives became somewhat easier.
Easy answer is to keep your in-law out of your home, and stay out of theirs. Other family members will continue to pretend, so be ready to lose them in the process.
Easy answer is to keep your in-law out of your home, and stay out of theirs. Other family members will continue to pretend, so be ready to lose them in the process.
Jonah71
Member
I moved into an appartment 15 months ago where I know live alone. My number one rule, now that it's up to me alone, is that nobody is allowed through the door that I have reason not to trust. It makes no difference who they are with. That has upset a couple of family members but so be it. My peace of mind, my appartment and MY rules...or stay away. It may sound harsh but it has solved so many of the problems I had to deal with for a lot of years. I've been accused of being a hard judgemental poor excuse for a Baptist Minister. My response is...I'll open the doors for them with no worries....every Sunday morning at 9am.... at church.
I agree with what a lot of people have said here. If you can't trust someone to the point you believe you may need a gun....Don't let them in. Call the law. Do not put youself in a position where YOU are the one going to jail. After all, would you rather have some hurt feelings among family members or possibly have to take another person's life?
I agree with what a lot of people have said here. If you can't trust someone to the point you believe you may need a gun....Don't let them in. Call the law. Do not put youself in a position where YOU are the one going to jail. After all, would you rather have some hurt feelings among family members or possibly have to take another person's life?
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