So this actually happened last night just before I was supposed to go to work at 21:15....I call it a “perfect storm” for many reasons. But I can’t even fathom the odds. First, a little back story. Fair warning: This will be a long post so I can give an accurate representation of the events.
My girlfriend and I are both nurses. Before that I worked 8 years at a psych facility primarily as a tech but we were also our own security. I have a history of wrestling and MMA (I’m no Bas Ruten or Royce Gracie but I can and have held my own against much larger and stronger opponents) and my threat assessment skills are way above average. She was an aide for 10 years in Alzheimer’s/Dementia/Psych at the VA. So she’s seen a lot too. Currently she is a nurse at small facility.
About 3 weeks ago she got a phone call at work (nightshift) from some guy who said he was going to be a resident at her facility and wanted to know some information about the place. The longer he talked, the more sexual the conversation became. Eventually she hung up but it freaked her out to the point she came home and woke me up in a panic and sobbing. Not a good way to wake up. There has also been a guy sighted outside the facility a couple times. Long story (it will get longer) the police are involved. And she has a G2C in her purse until her Glock 19 gets here. That was her decision but I supported it. She’s a good shot but needs practice for real life scenarios.
So last night at ~20:45 I’m in the garage having my daily energy drink and a cigarette before getting ready for work. I usually have the garage door open about a foot or so to circulate the air. This night was no different. I hear a vehicle pull into the drive and someone gets out and walks by the garage. I can see he’s wearing pull on work boots. Well, we have three kids but I’m not the father. The dads both wear the same style of boots. I figured one of them had shown up for various reasons. It’s not uncommon for them to come by but it is a little late. Regardless though, I get along great with the dads. So them being here doesn’t concern me. The boots are still standing by the garage and I hear a voice that doesn’t sound like one of them say “Well would you go get her for a minute”. So now I think it’s the one of the neighborhood dads looking for his kid. We have kids over all the time because we have a big trampoline and our dogs (Male Catahoula and a female Saint Dane) have 8 week old puppies. So of course we’re popular. But again, it’s late for kids to be over. So I decide to go see what’s going on. Walk into the kitchen where my girlfriend is making my lunch and asked what neighborhood kids are here. She turns and says no one. Red flag. About that time I hear the door open and hear a guy call out “Hey where are you” Red flag 2. I come out of the kitchen and see a man standing in my living room. Immediate threat assessment kind of like Robert Downy Jr in Sherlock Holmes: Older male, no weapons because I can see one hand is open and the other is mostly failing at holding his pants up, he’s wearing 3 pairs of glasses, open denim shirt revealing tabs still stuck to him from a recent ECG, not standing in an aggressive or elusive posture. Instantly I know this is a psych patient. But he is in my home and shouldn’t be. I’m heading towards him deciding what to do and asked in a command presence voice “can I help you!?” Just then I heard another man’s voice “Jimmy (real name withheld) you don’t live here!?” I look up and see a younger (early 30’s) deputy sheriff standing at my door with a look of horror in his face. “C’mon get out of there. Let’s go. I’m so sorry.”
Now the pieces are starting to come together. I’m no longer in defend/protect mode. We get the guy outside and I walk back in to let everyone know everything is alright. My girlfriend is FREAKED out. Our oldest is in her room balling. Middle and youngest are in their rooms with the door shut. I tell my girlfriend everything is ok. She’s not listening. Ok. I’m going back outside. Deputy drives away. Go back inside. Girlfriend has burnt my dinner all to hell. Oldest can still be heard balling. I’m going to be late for work (I don’t miss work) so I call and let them know. A few minutes goes by and there’s a knock at the door. It’s the deputy and a city officer. He had come back to apologize again, explain what happened, and offers to have me fill out a complaint. Knowing he’s a psych patient, I know the DA will never prosecute. I’m pissed at the situation because I know the officer should always make first contact when taking someone to a home they’ve never taken them to before. Especially if it’s a psych patient. But I also know from experience that psych patients can take a completely random object and make up a vague yet believable story about that object without missing a beat. Turns out, that’s exactly what happened.
Jimmy had gotten into a domestic with his mother. Apparently this happens a lot but the mother always refuses to press any charges. The deputy responds and upon refusal to press charges asks if there is anywhere he can take him for the night. Jimmy says he has a place he can stay so they load up and start driving. Jimmy gave him directions to our house. Didn’t drive around and randomly pick one. He told him what specific roads to take and which specific house. When they arrived here, the deputy inquired about the vehicles in the driveway. Jimmy instantly said one was his sisters and the other was her boyfriend Jeremy. He also said they had crazy dogs. Well, my Catahoula and St. Dane were barking like crazy. We have a lot of coyotes around because we live in a rural area so it’s not uncommon for them to bark at night. And they have puppies so they’re extra territorial. We have been keeping the puppies outside at night if the weather is nice, or we wake up to a mine field and small lakes each morning. After 8 weeks we’re tired of mine fields and lakes. And they’re big puppies so you can imagine. So the adult dogs were outside protecting the pups.
The deputy also offered to get me in contact with his supervisor if I wanted to file a complaint against him. I declined. I could have. And I would have been completely justified in doing so. But I declined.
Here’s why I declined and why I said it was a perfect storm.
1. Had my male been inside, he would have torn Jimmy apart. He’s 105lbs of solidness and has no fear. But he wasn’t and therefore didn’t.
2. Had I not had a history in psych and good threat assessment skills, I would have either grabbed my pistol (that was within 8’ of me) and possibly shot him or beaten him to a pulp. I was on my way to put hands on him when I heard and subsequently saw the deputy at the door. But I do have those attributes, and I did hear and see the deputy. So, I didn’t.
3. The deputy knew he screwed up. And he was genuinely remorseful. But had I or my dog engaged Jimmy, there would be no way to avoid the report of injury to Jimmy and possible firing of this deputy. As it stood, no one was hurt. The females in the house were freaked out. But no injuries. So I saw this as a teachable moment for the younger deputy about dealing with psych patients and following procedure when taking someone to a residence. I’m still debating about calling the actual sheriff and having a meeting with him. Not to get the deputy in trouble. But because I know how perfect this storm was and how easily this could have been bad for everyone. And so he could use this as a lesson for his deputies in the future.
4. I am the grandson, son, brother, and best friend of police officers. I know how stressful the job can be. Especially today. And I don’t want someone’s career ended over a mistake that didn’t end in injury when it could instead be used as a valuable lesson. We’re all human.
But seriously, what are the odds? What are the odds my girlfriend gets these calls, has someone around her facility, that I have the background in psych and threat assessment skills, that my dogs were outside, that a psych patient comes in my house, delivered by a deputy, and that the deputy calls out at just the right moment, and that no one was hurt, or worse?
My girlfriend and I are both nurses. Before that I worked 8 years at a psych facility primarily as a tech but we were also our own security. I have a history of wrestling and MMA (I’m no Bas Ruten or Royce Gracie but I can and have held my own against much larger and stronger opponents) and my threat assessment skills are way above average. She was an aide for 10 years in Alzheimer’s/Dementia/Psych at the VA. So she’s seen a lot too. Currently she is a nurse at small facility.
About 3 weeks ago she got a phone call at work (nightshift) from some guy who said he was going to be a resident at her facility and wanted to know some information about the place. The longer he talked, the more sexual the conversation became. Eventually she hung up but it freaked her out to the point she came home and woke me up in a panic and sobbing. Not a good way to wake up. There has also been a guy sighted outside the facility a couple times. Long story (it will get longer) the police are involved. And she has a G2C in her purse until her Glock 19 gets here. That was her decision but I supported it. She’s a good shot but needs practice for real life scenarios.
So last night at ~20:45 I’m in the garage having my daily energy drink and a cigarette before getting ready for work. I usually have the garage door open about a foot or so to circulate the air. This night was no different. I hear a vehicle pull into the drive and someone gets out and walks by the garage. I can see he’s wearing pull on work boots. Well, we have three kids but I’m not the father. The dads both wear the same style of boots. I figured one of them had shown up for various reasons. It’s not uncommon for them to come by but it is a little late. Regardless though, I get along great with the dads. So them being here doesn’t concern me. The boots are still standing by the garage and I hear a voice that doesn’t sound like one of them say “Well would you go get her for a minute”. So now I think it’s the one of the neighborhood dads looking for his kid. We have kids over all the time because we have a big trampoline and our dogs (Male Catahoula and a female Saint Dane) have 8 week old puppies. So of course we’re popular. But again, it’s late for kids to be over. So I decide to go see what’s going on. Walk into the kitchen where my girlfriend is making my lunch and asked what neighborhood kids are here. She turns and says no one. Red flag. About that time I hear the door open and hear a guy call out “Hey where are you” Red flag 2. I come out of the kitchen and see a man standing in my living room. Immediate threat assessment kind of like Robert Downy Jr in Sherlock Holmes: Older male, no weapons because I can see one hand is open and the other is mostly failing at holding his pants up, he’s wearing 3 pairs of glasses, open denim shirt revealing tabs still stuck to him from a recent ECG, not standing in an aggressive or elusive posture. Instantly I know this is a psych patient. But he is in my home and shouldn’t be. I’m heading towards him deciding what to do and asked in a command presence voice “can I help you!?” Just then I heard another man’s voice “Jimmy (real name withheld) you don’t live here!?” I look up and see a younger (early 30’s) deputy sheriff standing at my door with a look of horror in his face. “C’mon get out of there. Let’s go. I’m so sorry.”
Now the pieces are starting to come together. I’m no longer in defend/protect mode. We get the guy outside and I walk back in to let everyone know everything is alright. My girlfriend is FREAKED out. Our oldest is in her room balling. Middle and youngest are in their rooms with the door shut. I tell my girlfriend everything is ok. She’s not listening. Ok. I’m going back outside. Deputy drives away. Go back inside. Girlfriend has burnt my dinner all to hell. Oldest can still be heard balling. I’m going to be late for work (I don’t miss work) so I call and let them know. A few minutes goes by and there’s a knock at the door. It’s the deputy and a city officer. He had come back to apologize again, explain what happened, and offers to have me fill out a complaint. Knowing he’s a psych patient, I know the DA will never prosecute. I’m pissed at the situation because I know the officer should always make first contact when taking someone to a home they’ve never taken them to before. Especially if it’s a psych patient. But I also know from experience that psych patients can take a completely random object and make up a vague yet believable story about that object without missing a beat. Turns out, that’s exactly what happened.
Jimmy had gotten into a domestic with his mother. Apparently this happens a lot but the mother always refuses to press any charges. The deputy responds and upon refusal to press charges asks if there is anywhere he can take him for the night. Jimmy says he has a place he can stay so they load up and start driving. Jimmy gave him directions to our house. Didn’t drive around and randomly pick one. He told him what specific roads to take and which specific house. When they arrived here, the deputy inquired about the vehicles in the driveway. Jimmy instantly said one was his sisters and the other was her boyfriend Jeremy. He also said they had crazy dogs. Well, my Catahoula and St. Dane were barking like crazy. We have a lot of coyotes around because we live in a rural area so it’s not uncommon for them to bark at night. And they have puppies so they’re extra territorial. We have been keeping the puppies outside at night if the weather is nice, or we wake up to a mine field and small lakes each morning. After 8 weeks we’re tired of mine fields and lakes. And they’re big puppies so you can imagine. So the adult dogs were outside protecting the pups.
The deputy also offered to get me in contact with his supervisor if I wanted to file a complaint against him. I declined. I could have. And I would have been completely justified in doing so. But I declined.
Here’s why I declined and why I said it was a perfect storm.
1. Had my male been inside, he would have torn Jimmy apart. He’s 105lbs of solidness and has no fear. But he wasn’t and therefore didn’t.
2. Had I not had a history in psych and good threat assessment skills, I would have either grabbed my pistol (that was within 8’ of me) and possibly shot him or beaten him to a pulp. I was on my way to put hands on him when I heard and subsequently saw the deputy at the door. But I do have those attributes, and I did hear and see the deputy. So, I didn’t.
3. The deputy knew he screwed up. And he was genuinely remorseful. But had I or my dog engaged Jimmy, there would be no way to avoid the report of injury to Jimmy and possible firing of this deputy. As it stood, no one was hurt. The females in the house were freaked out. But no injuries. So I saw this as a teachable moment for the younger deputy about dealing with psych patients and following procedure when taking someone to a residence. I’m still debating about calling the actual sheriff and having a meeting with him. Not to get the deputy in trouble. But because I know how perfect this storm was and how easily this could have been bad for everyone. And so he could use this as a lesson for his deputies in the future.
4. I am the grandson, son, brother, and best friend of police officers. I know how stressful the job can be. Especially today. And I don’t want someone’s career ended over a mistake that didn’t end in injury when it could instead be used as a valuable lesson. We’re all human.
But seriously, what are the odds? What are the odds my girlfriend gets these calls, has someone around her facility, that I have the background in psych and threat assessment skills, that my dogs were outside, that a psych patient comes in my house, delivered by a deputy, and that the deputy calls out at just the right moment, and that no one was hurt, or worse?
