MrBorland,
Good questions. I do not do anything with my brass, I use Hornady 5 stage progressive reloading equipment with the case actuated powder dispenser. I do not weigh my bullets or do any kind of sorting of any components. I measure my powder loads every ten cartridges to make sure my settings have not changed. They rarely do. If the loading changes by a tenth of a grain I doubt if it has a significant affect on accuracy (I am probably wrong here, but my scale can do no better than a tenth anyway).
I use jacketed bullets because I believe the higher the velocity the more stable the bullet and the less affected by wind and, of course, less drop. It is no surprise to me that a .204 hustling along at 4000 fps is probably as stable a condition as can be achieved. The less time to target, the less time outside disturbances have to ruin accuracy. Shooting lead bullets at more than 1000 fps is considered a no-no (ref: Hornady Reloading Manual). If I were sticking with 25 yard shooting, I would be using the .38 in a wad cutter light load at about 800 fps (again Hornady says that is the most accurate velocity for lead). But since my bullets are in the air 4 times longer than that I want high velocity. I use the hollow point XTP because I believe it is the most stable flying bullet made. The hollow point moves more mass outward and with the spin gives more stability (my idea, could be very wrong). I use 125 grain bullets as a compromise. The heavier bullet does have a better BC (it is longer) but it also has more recoil in order to keep the same velocity. It also has more surface area to engage the bore. To be honest here, a friend of mine recently sold me 400 125 grain bullets, so that is what I am using. In my area there are no Hornady bullets to be had, period. I called Hornady and they are woefully back ordered!
Once I feel that I am not the limitation in accuracy (after wringing all I can out of the new scope), I will then start playing with bullet weights, type and cartridge variables. I usually know when the big boom happens (and a .357 loaded with 10 grains of AA#5 is a pretty big boom) whether or not it was a good shot without having to look at the target. When I keep calling good shots but the bullet holes don't support that, then I will start looking more at my equipment.
I am almost 70, so I have a few physical and mental limitations, but I sure enjoy the challenge. I am also a runner and swimmer, so I have good physical conditioning which should help me get closer to the 1 MOA grouping.
I hope I answered your questions. Feel free to ask more.