Did a good Thing Today

[Strings]

Spencer: PM sent. And good on ya for standing up for someone in need!

 

[Sage of Seattle]

I hope you keep in mind that the greatest threat to your security and your wife's is battered mom and her daughter. They have a strange way of being overcome by guilt and try to 'mend fences' with their abuser against all good advice and their own experiences. In doing so they will drag you into the midst of it to be a 'referee'.

I suggest if mom and daughter try to 'make nice' with abusive dad you and your wife show them the door and give them directions to the nearest battered womens' shelter.

+1 to Pilgrim.

I'm a male and I've been in an abusive relationship (I was emotionally and mentally abused); I also have dealings with "rescuing" two women at one time or another from their own abusive relationships, so I do speak from a little bit of knowledge.

spencerhut, continue doing what you're doing and don't let anyone ever tell you that you didn't do the right thing. Just be prepared for the time when the spouse MAY go back again and perhaps shun you and your family for your so-called "interference."

And, by the way, the two women whom I helped are still with their abusive husbands. Even though I was accused of having affairs with them, I think the hardest thing that I had to deal with was that two ordinarily bright, caring women were ultimately too frightened to change for the better. It takes a huge amount of emotional energy and strength to break free from the clutching gravity of the abuser, so in a way, I don't blame them; however, it is ultimately their choice to stay with their abuser, so they must accept responsibility for it.

 

[Strings]

On average, it takes an abuse victim 7 tries before successfully removing themselves from the abuser...

Do NOT let the lady draw you in if she decides to "mend fences". By all means, let her know you'll be there to help her better herself, but she has to leave in order to do so.

That's one of the unfortunate things about helping people in these situations...

 

[Browns Fan]

Quote:
"Talks about what a whore his soon to be ex wife is, tells people she is evil."

He's the one who is cheating on her and he calls her a whore?

 

[Strings]

That's common stuff, Brown's Fan. You would not believe some of the stuff I've seen pulled. And I'm sure that I haven't seen the worst: talk to a divorce attorney sme time, about what THEY'VE seen...

 

[sacp81170a]

That's common stuff, Brown's Fan. You would not believe some of the stuff I've seen pulled.

That's why DV laws have changed so radically. I used to work for the Wyoming Supreme Court, so I got to see lots of county court clerks just grit their teeth in anger when an abused spouse or girlfriend would come down and bail their abuser out or refuse to press charges. They especially hated it when they had to come in on a holiday weekend (like this one) only to see someone locked up for breaking down a door and beating up their girlfriend walk free. Now guess what? The state presses charges. This has led to all the negative results we keep seeing here about false accusations or simply fear of abuse costing someone their gun rights. It seems like it's a never ending downward spiral, and it's hard to see that there's gonna be a way out of it for our society as a whole.

Spencerhut, hso's advice about seeing a lawyer ASAP is right on the money. As others have stated, abused spouses can't be counted on to react rationally or tell the truth if they are still intimidated by their abuser. Hate to say it, but in a couple months time, it could be their word against yours that you threatened him when he was just being a nice guy. Get legal advice ASAP.

Still, you did the right thing at the time.

 

[ConstitutionCowboy]

If you can find a hot looking and intelligent woman that likes guns and fast cars . . . marry her quickly.

I did!

Woody

Look at your rights and freedoms as what would be required to survive and be free as if there were no government. Governments come and go, but your rights live on. If you wish to survive government, you must protect with jealous resolve all the powers that come with your rights - especially with the Right to Keep and Bear Arms. Without the power of those arms, you will perish with that government - or at its hand. B.E. Wood

 

[sonofodin]

I commend you sir for good actions renderd. I would have done the same thing, without hesitation. Wish I had friends like you.