Guns and dating

[vaupet]

I and several others at our schooting club have discovered the power of the big-eyed-children.
As all children like schooting if it is presented to them, we started a youth educational program.
So now, when we meet new people, they are bound to ask these nice polite children about their hobbies.
When such a child (between 10 and 14 years preferably) tell they are chooters, that shure opens the conversation and you get a good shot at explainig the fine hobby.
This is ever so important in "liberal" europe.

 

[Officers'Wife]

Yeah, I like the Range Date idea. If she outshoots ya, you can dump her.

This sounds like the basis for a crime novel or a country western song.

 

[FLAvalanche]

Personally, I don't think waiting a while to bring it up is a good idea. I also don't think breaking her in slowly and hoping for the best is a good idea either. This is probably coming from getting back into the dating scene after ending a 15 year marriage, but I don't want to keep my hobbies under wraps to please someone. In my mind, it's just not worth it.

My hobbies are a big part of my life. Hunting, shooting, fishing and camping are my mental therapy. I'm going to go do those things. I don't want my trying to do those things to become a PITA. I don't want to tip toe around someone to go to the range or my favorite hunting of fishing spot.

Luckily, down here there are a lot of redneck girls but I did come across my share of antis or those that weren't comfortable with guns. I would just move on.

I found one that loves to fish, loves to camp, and loves to shoot. I didn't have to "groom" her to enjoy my hobbies, I didn't have to sugar coat anything with her. This is me, this is what I do and who I am, if you don't like it there's the door. She chose to stay.

She knows that if I go hunting of fishing I may not come back until the wee hours of the morning. She's glad I'm sitting in a boat or a ground blind instead of sitting at a bar stool or some sleazy couch in a strip club.

Usually she's sitting right beside me.

Believe me, that's much more fun than trying to bring it on slowly.

It might be different for you. You might feel it's worth it to take it slow with someone who is unsure or on the fence. If you do, do it right. It just wasn't for me at this point in my life.

 

[Onward Allusion]

If I had to start dating again, shooting sports would be one of the first subjects on the first date. Kind of like "So what do you like to do with your free time?" question. Depending on the response, there may not be a 2nd date.

When I turned 40, I realized that I'm not going to change for anyone except myself, and shooting sports and protecting myself and those I care about are extremely important to me.

Broken11b
Guns and dating
Okay, I normally dont post threads like this. And moderators, feel free to delete this if it's too off topic.

Hypothetically, if you were single and going on dates with new people.
How do you bring up the subject that you own firearms... lots of them?

It'd be fine if it was just one or two, but since I have a collection that would be hard to notice, how do you go about breaking this to a new person?

 

[DirtyHarry31]

Being divorced @ 26 I had my love of guns since I was 11. I wasn't giving it up for any woman. After 10 + years of dealing with the antis or mis-informed, I would pass on girls that were totally not into it. I had a few that did not like a gun present while we dated but when in the streets of Philly one must be prepared. I would sneak it, making sure I kept her to the side opposite the gun. One time I got fix up on a blind date with a teacher who was not fond of guns. I challeged her to try it before you judge. Never shot a pistol before but you would not have known by the way she shot. We went over the safety rules & showed her how to use the gun & sight the target. Had her try my Berretta 92FS in 9mm. Told her to focus on something she really hated. I put a human target down range (indoors) about 15 ft and let her go at it. All 17 rds on target at the head & groin. Asked her what she was thinking when she was shooting to do so well, "my ex of course". Ended up marrying the girl. She is not fond of guns still but she knows it's part of my life & hers. I know when we are around people & we have "gun talk" she jumps right in & brags about her shooting. Taught all her kids (3 boys, my 2 boys are a given) and our princess who is now 14. You can win people over, they just don't want to deal with paranoid or wreckless people. Be mature about it without belittling and we can win most people to this fun & exciting sport.

 

[Broken11b]

Wow... all this help came fast. Normally it takes a few days before I get to one page.

I appreciate all of the help and ideas.

My concerns arent so much that people will find out I'm a gun nut, that will happen eventually. I just want it to be on my own pace. My place is littered with evidence of my obsession everywhere. If the smell of Hoppe's or cleaning equipment doesnt send some clues, I'm sure something else will.

Is there a way to warn someone instead of just placing large portions of my home off limits?

 

[Dnaltrop]

Have one room devoted entirely to it, partition well, but keep the door open so it doesn't look like you're hiding it.

I've found the word "plink" to be a very good one. Try and be scary with it.

"i'm gonna plink you, you no good snake"

See? utter failure.

Edit, Shooter to Unknown, Phrase # 2 " Would you like to come out on a drive through the Forest, and plink some cans with me? " ^^

If they run from that...

 

[redbullitt]

Agreed ^ lol

 

[Corporal K]

When I was single (college days), I usually knew the girls I went out with fairly well before we connected romantically. They all knew I was a gun guy. I always brought it up. Some of them were a little turned on by the whole thing.

 

[Cosmoline]

For dating I find the best resource are these great little notebooks on Colt, Winchester and others:

http://www.georgemadis.com/pages/merch.html

 

[Corporal K]

"Gun nut" is not a great self-description. Sounds like a guy who lives in his mom's basement.

Gun-enthusiast, gun-hobbyist, into self-defense - all sound a lot better.

Also, having a few other hobbies is important.

 

[mack]

Dating

1 be sincere
2 be interested in her and what she has to say
3 treat her with respect
4 share an emotionally intimate story of some loss of tragedy in your life
5 look lovingly into her eyes with a hint of desire
6 touch her gently and briefly on the arm or hand or neck
7 dress nice, have a nice ride, and have roll of cash she can see when you pay the bill

If you can fake those first six things and do number 7 then you are home free.

But remember - telling or showing her what you are packing before she aknowledges an interest is a sure way to get smacked or arrested. Brandishing is against the law.

Or

You could just be honest - take the time to get to know her - just have fun - and let it come up and out naturally as a part of your life - if she gets to know you - comes to like and trust you - then she is more likely to accept you for who you are - if not then it wasn't meant to be.

 

[Carter]

Be careful with the RANGE DATE idea...MTV or VH1 (w/e one it is...) says that makes you undatable...and we all know w/e they say must be abided by.

Just so you know...that was sarcasim.


My gf loves range dates. However, she does get rather tired of me always looking at guns, messing with my guns, reading about guns, etc. My defense is that she is always on facebook. But I digress.

 

[hardluk1]

When i grew up most guys i knew all had rifles and or shotguns in the rear window of your trucks. Went to school with them. First conversation with the girl that i would marry is, I hope you like hunting ,fishing,camping, fourwheeling and most anything outdoors. The only thing i did that bothed her was airboats. But i had several over some years. Been married 30 years and together 34 so i guess i picked right. And on a good day with the 22's she will out shot me. But thats ok..

 

[Joe Demko]

The only time it didn't work for me was one individual that went out to the car and brought back his AR-15 to show Dad. I never accepted another date from the guy.

What was wrong with it, was it from Model 1 or something?

It probably didn't have enough x's on The Chart.

 

[ABTOMAT]

I'd probably want to have a decent feel for how the woman would react, or at least broach the topic in as easy a way as possible for starters. No "let's head back to my place and I'll show you every rifle used by Russia from 1900 to 1975." It's another hobby for me, not something to base a relationship around. As long as she was OK with _me_ owning them I wouldn't force the issue.

I lucked out, though. Before I even met my current girlfriend in person I mentioned to her I was getting my CCW permit. Turns out she came from a hunting family, her grandfather's a gun collector, and she wants me to teach her how to shoot. And this is Massachusetts.

 

[rozziboy18]

i second the range date!!!!

true story,
i met a beautiful girl through my space here in knoxville and took her out on a few dates and one weekend i asked here if she would come with me to my local rang, gatlinburg sportsman club. she said yes and we went, that day we shot the 100 yrd range with my 308, kimber 45 and ruger 10/22. she out shot me with the rifles and came close on the pistol!!!! we have ben married for a year now!!!

fyi note, she carrys a ruger lcp that i bought her as a wedding present every day!! and she only weres her dimond ear rings i got her for chrismas once a month!!!!

 

[Justin Holder]

This is me, this is what I do and who I am, if you don't like it there's the door.

Truer words have never been said.

 

[wrs840]

My wife of 27 years didn't come from a "gun family" but they had nothing against it. They're Southern folks. I'm sure her dad had a old shotgun somewhere in the house.

I turned her into an enthusiast, way back when, with a 20 ga Mossberg pump, shooting metal gallon paint-cans in a field with #4 hi-brass bird-loads. She was quickly successful, and therefore took about ten minutes to warm-up to the whole idea of guns. No pressure. Just fun in success with "hits".

A "Range Date" might be intimidating, depending on the range, and who's there to witness. Got a grassy field, a 20ga, and some paint-cans? Worked for me.

Les

 

[LibShooter]

I don't date much anymore. My wife won't let me. However, my advice is to discuss your gun hobby when it comes up naturally in conversation. Don't force it. Don't hide it.

The same advice goes for your Star Wars action figure collection and your stint as President of the "Glee" fan club.

 

[gym]

Why don't these things come up in normal conversation in the first few minutes of boy girl talk. What do you enjoy, "long walks in the park, nice restaurants, and shooting my AR into refrigerators. not so hard. She's either going to laugh or run. She may have a bigger gun that you do. First date with my wife, I just asked her if she minded putting my auto in her purse, so I could enjoy my meal. She said shure thing. She still mentions it today, but it was an ice breaker. I dated way too many girls, married at 50, and even though I am a lot older than some of these younger fellas, I never had a gal run away from me because I carried a gun. And I grew up in an anti gun state, NYC, so I personally think too much is made of this to begin with. Usually the girl will say "are you a cop" if anything.

 

[J.R.W.]

Our second Christmas together, my girlfriend asked for a gun. She now has a Ruger P95 and we're engaged.

 

[Barbara]

Try being a woman. I scare most men, dating or otherwise.

 

[52grain]

I think that if you are big into guns and she is way against guns, guns probably won't be the only thing that you disagree about.

Sooner or later, you'll get around to talking about hobbies. You can mention it then or if she asks what you are doing the next day you could say that you're going shooting, hunting, etc. The thing to not do is go on and on about it (unless she has a large collection of her own).

 

[oldbanjo]

It's not necessary for everyone that comes in your house to see your guns. My girlfriend and I have lived together 12+ years and she hasn't seen all my guns. She has no need to see them. If you show your guns to girls that you bring to your house, I promise you, you will lose them. I have been working for myself on Diesel Engines and Tractor Trailers for friends. One driver divorced his wife, she had sold everything he had to buy drugs including his guns, another driver saw me at Walmart and told me that two guns had been stole and asked what type of Alarm sys I had, he had his wife with him so I called him later and told him he didn't need what I had, that he needed a camera. His wife is also on drugs. I would shock you if you knew how many people use drugs, I knew a lot of cops that smoked dope, them and their wife's. They were Narcotic Officers.