Who called you paranoid?

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Nobody, at least out loud - but who knows what they're thinking...? ;)

And I open carry most of the time, too.

We have a really weird neighbor (but hopefully not for too much longer) and my wife's friends seem to appreciate it when I escort them back out to their car after dark.
 
I Am Paranoid

People think I'm paranoid because, I AM! Paranoia guides my life everyday.

I use a seat belt because I am paranoid about the other driver.

I lock my pool gate because I am paranoid about a child drowning in my pool.

I look before I cross a street because I am afraid a car may hit me.

I watch my children because I have an unreasonable fear that there are bad people out there wanting to hurt them.

I carry because I am paranoid that one of the thousands of criminals I have dealt with may hold a grudge.

A common thread here is that many of us have been called paranoid, until someone needs help.

In Beirut I was called paranoid for having my men fill sandbags every day for a month or so. When they blew up the Marine barracks next to us, no one thought I was paranoid while they pulled plate glass and rebar out of the sandbags they slept next to. Two hundred feet away, I had 39 men and no casualties. Call me paranoid all you want.
 
Some years ago a fellow employee at the govdotorg agency I worked for was charging me with all sorts of malfeasance trash and I was under investigation by his elected official doing a Congressional Inquiry. The "Inquisition" was being conducted by a senior aid of he elected official who brought out a stenographer and a weasel type lawyer with him.

As I entered the hearing room I was greeted and invited to have a seat. As I walked to my chair I asked, "Well, what does my friend - - - have to say about me this time?" The little weasely looking lawyer looked up and declared in a loud voice, "He's paranoid, he's paranoid!" I looked at him, smiled, and said back just as loudly, "I am not paranoid, I KNOW that - - - is out to get me!" The Inquisitor said, "We cannot tell you who is the accuser as that is an 'anonomous' person. Before I moved another step towards the chair I stopped and smiled and said, "In that case we have nothing further to discuss and you folks have a nice weekend in SF at government expense!" I turned as if to exit the room and the Grand Inquistor laughed and said, "OK, come on back, his name is - - -, allright?" I said that I just wanted the record straight and that we would not be playing games around some anomonous entity that meant nothing.

During the next hour I put to rest the charges against me and blew - - -'s whole "case" against me out of the water. I ws supposed to have cheated on my time sheet, misused a goverment vehicle for personal reasons, comandeered a government vehicle when it was taking an ill employee to the government hospital and a few other charges that are not even worth remembering.

My accuser tried some other tactics including suing me and 50 "et als" for 2 Million dollars each. The federal judge declared the charges bogus and dismissed the case. My nemisis went to Texas to pick up a plane that his uncle left him and he went up and crashed within sight of the runway. I'll admit that I wanted him to go away but not that way He had a law degree and was a bright person but had a one track mind. He saw himself as the Lone Ranger and I saw myself as Batman and we were like two trains headed towards each other on the same track. When I was served with the papers for the phony lawsuit I knew that he was likely down the street with a camera and telphoto lens recording my facial expressions. I kept my face expressionless and thanked the person serving me the papers.

No one else has ever called me "paranoid" that I am aware of.
 
My wife thought I was paranoid to bring a gun on vacation...

Until we almost got stuck in Miami during a hurricane and she realized how defenceless we would have been. The same goes for the water purification filter and flashlights I always bring on vacation. Clean water was hard to come by after the storm! I'm not paranoid, I'm prepared. :neener:
 
Why would they want to label you?

I do not have a CCW (new to shooting and in NE) but I do spend a lot of time on boats. When I anchor for the night, I don't just chuck it over the side. I look at the wind, tide, sea state, other boats if any, remember what the forecast said about any changes. I back down on the anchor, take cross bearings which I check before bed. Before I go below, I double check the anchor line for chafe.
When I get up for my midnight squirt (57 year old prostate) I check wind, waves and my cross bearings.
In that setting it is not called paranoia, it is called seamanship and is generally to be admired.
IMHO calling someone paranoid is actually an attempt at denial that danger exists.
 
Q - Why do you think everyone is out to get us
A - At least one of them is, if you can tell me who, I'll ignore the rest

Words to live by. :D
 
Why would I be paranoid? I've got a gun ... and fire extinguisher ... and seat belt ... and steel-toed boots ... and ...

What's odd is that the ones who label ME paranoid are the ones who are constantly expressing fear about all kinds of things going wrong - things which, go figure, they haven't prepared for.

Reminds me that my cardiologist expressed reserved skepticism about my gun ownership (couldn't hide it when carrying "In The Gravest Extreme" and the like at the time) ... until right after 9/11, when he asked what kind of gun he should get. Ditto those who laughed at me about survival preparedness ... until Y2K appraoched, and they said they would be visiting me if anything went wrong - and their chuckles were obviously a thin veil over their seriousness in saying so.

All too often, it's not those labeled paranoid who are afraid - it's the ones doing the labelling.
 
Paranoia Quotes


I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code.
-Emo Phillips

No matter how paranoid I get, it's never enough to keep up.

The question is not whether I'm paranoid, it's whether I'm paranoid enough.

The truly paraniod are rarely conned.

Doesn't matter if I'm paranoid - they're still after me.

I sincerely believe people talk about me. Mine would be a pretty meaningless existance if they didn't.

Why are some people terrified of "black helicopters" and don't even notice that they are being monitored almost constantly by the whole network of obvious surveilance cameras, credit cards, ATMs, EZpass, company ID/access cards, magazine subscriptions, SSNs, taxes, fees, video rentals, Internet firewall recording, 'cookies', ... ?

Paranoia: the belief that someone cares.

Paranoia is the belief in a hidden order behind the visible.

When everyone is out to get you, paranoia is only good thinking.

"Paranoia is knowing all the facts."
- Woody Allen

"Paranoia is just another word for longevity."
- Laurell K. Hamilton, The Laughing Corpse

"Perfect paranoia is perfect awareness."

"Paranoia is reality seen on a finer scale."
- Philo Gant, Strange Days

"The issue is not whether you are paranoid, the issue is whether you are paranoid enough."
- Max, Strange Days

"Why are you so paranoid, Mulder?"
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's because I find it hard to trust anybody."
- Scully & Mulder, The X-Files, "Ascension"

Paranoia strikes deep
Into your life it will creep
It starts when you're
always afraid. You step out
of line, the man come and
take you away.

"I don't agonize over decisions as much these days. The criteria of what's important to me is clear. The insecurity that you feel, and the paranoia that you feel, have been around for a long time -- you know it's a liar because it's been lying to you all along -- every time you start something new. You get used to it, and you sort of go, 'Oh, you're showing up again, well f*** you.'"
- John Cusack

Freedom is just a hallucination created by a pathological lack of paranoia.

Paranoia doesn't mean the whole world really isn't out to get you.

If you ever wanted to know what a person with acute paranoia looks like, just keep watching.

I have the power to channel my imagination into ever-soaring levels of suspicion and paranoia.

Paranoia is heightened awareness.

Paranoia is a social disease--you get it from screwing other people.

"Paranoia is the delusion that your enemies are organized."
- Arthur D. Hlavaty.

"This is the Nineties, Bubba, and there is no such thing as Paranoia. It's all true."
- Hunter S Thompson

"There are two kinds of paranoia: Total, and insufficient. I am both, because if you think you are sufficiently paranoid, you're not."
- Guildenstern, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

"The truly paranoid are clever enough to not *act* paranoid."
- Q, Star Trek: The Next Generation

"When everyone _is_ out to get to you, being paranoid isn't going to help." -
- Q, Star Trek: The Next Generation

"When did you get so paranoid?"
"When they started plotting against me."
- The Paper

"Paranoia is only the leading edge of the discovery that everything in the world is connected."
- `The Illuminatus Trilogy'

When you've been through everything I have, paranoia is merely a precaution!

Paranoia is not the belief that everybody's out to get you -- they are.
Paranoia is the belief that everybody's conspiring to get you.

The greater the concentration of power, the greater the paranoia it generates about its need to destroy everything outside itself.

I love this job. Nothing like paranoia and neurosis. Who needs a Coke habit? I've got journalism!!

There's something inherently American about paranoia. Given the increasing scarcity of rational things to fear in 20th century American society, we dream up theories whose inevitable result is the chaotic disruption of our comfortable, orderly life-usually with dastardly consequences. I think we get a perverse thrill that comes from it.

"Mulder, are you suggesting that we somehow create our own quirky focal points of paranoia, as a result of the lack of things that are worth fearing in our day-to-day lives? That we're not whole as beings without something to worry about, something to keep our eye on?"
"That's my point exactly, Scully. What if, in a society characterized by a Goldilocks economy, we can't find anything to worry about? What if we somehow go looking for things to fear, things that will destroy this economy, things that will reach every corner of government, every
enterprise, every man, woman, and child?"
- X-Files
 
Update, had a discussion with the lil lady today. We were talking about how she once said I was paranoid, I asked if she thought I was paranoid because of all the guns...

"It's not just that"

Well, what else then?

"your, well, how many first aid/field surgery kits do you have?"

I have 2 FA kits, on FS kit. One FA in the car, the other and the FS kit is at home. You keep Band-Aids, alcohol, antiseptic/peroxide in the bathroom, right? Well, that great if we break a dish or a wine glass and cut our hands. What happens if one of our window panes breaks or something more serious happens? That's where my stuff comes in. Nothing wrong with that. So what else?

"All the ammo? and Your 100 water purification tablets? How many gallons is that for?"

Look, I buy in bulk to save money. You buy frozen pizzas by the dozen because it saves money. I order ammo and camping supplies online in bulk for the same reason.

"Oh, I didn't know that. Okay, look, you carry your gun EVERYWHERE. It's always near you in the house, you have a rifle in the trunk of your car, handgun on your hip and a bag full of survival supplies in your trunk as well...little paranoid?"

Okay, look, I have an overnight bag in the trunk. Sleeping bag, radio, flashlight, basic tools, a knife, mostly camping things. I drive 70 miles to work everyday, what happens if I break down? As for the gun on my hip, you're allergic to bees right?

"Yes."

And you carry that epi-pen in your purse, right?

"uh, yeah."

Well, I'm allergic to disaster. *patting my hip* THIS is MY epi-pen, okay?

"Okay, I understand then, the rifle though?"

Someone said online the other day something that really made sense to me. I don't think EVERYONE is out to get me, but I can be sure that someone might be. if you can tell me who that someone is, I'll ignore everyone else. It's like bringing a condom on a date. it doesn't mean you know you're going to score, but you have it, because if you need one, chances are you REALLY need one.


We had a god laugh at that. She decided I wasn't paranoid, but I was something more than just prepared. We're in the process of trying to agree on a word to define the level just above simple preparation, but not unstable like being paranoid.

Let you know how it turns out. :D
 
Those who know me don't insinuate I fear anything. Maybe behind my back but I've accomplished some amazing feats that most won't attempt so probably not. Who cares what a bunch of sissies think anyway? :D

Some strangers do seem paranoid of me. Little old ladies scurrying to get out of my way always causes me a big smile :) Men hold doors for me from far away. I suppose they worry I might take offense if they don't? I wouldn't but I appreciate the consideration. Some are smarter than most and do appear to realize I am hard to offend and they are extra safe around me.

I don't know that it means anything. People should be free to be afraid of things. People shouldn't be telling others they can't be afraid of thinigs (real or imagined). Unwarranted confidence is the cause for many seriously painful problems.
 
I used to be paranoid. The aliens kept beaming radiation into my brain. Now I have 736 cases of aluminum foil stockpiled in the basement for TEOTWAWKI.
I am no longer paranoid, just prepaired. When the scouts start landing from the mother ship, my neighbors will be beating on my door begging for hat material. :what:
 
I am no longer paranoid, just prepaired. When the scouts start landing from the mother ship, my neighbors will be beating on my door begging for hat material.
Click to expand...

I just finished watching C-Span coverage of Congress. So, uhm... can I borrow some of that uh "hat material" ?


:D
 
You never know...

Paranoid? Maybe you could call me that, but I just feel prepared...

I am always bewildered when I hear some people say they pick and choose when to carry ("nothing's going to happen at the grocery store", "it's not a rough neighborhood", etc.) or make fun of people for having a supply of food and water. Do these people read the newspaper?
 
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