Friends' wives won't let them have guns....

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itgoesboom

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I have a few friends who have commented to me that they would like to get a firearm or two (or twelve ;) ) but their wives/girlfriends won't let them purchase one.

Every single one is against having a firearm in their house.

Two of these friends have mentioned that they would like to get their CHLs, but they have to somehow convince their SO that they should get a firearm.

I don't really understand where they are coming from, since I purchased firearms before my wife and I met, and have continued to build up my collection since we got married.

But my friends would like my help convincing theirs significant others.

So help me help them.

I.G.B.
 
If you could, I'd start in conversation. Discuss guns, the facts and fiction surrounding them. Be sure to ask what their concerns are, and respond honestly and politely.

Any chance of getting them out to the range? Use the "perhaps you should try shooting before dismissing it" argument. Even the hardest of liberals won't be able to deny the logic if they have the slightest bit of sense left in them.

Involve your wife, too (assuming she's a shooter). Learning from another woman may remove some of the intimidation, and she's already got more credibility in the subject of women and firearms since she happens to be a woman who lives in a household with firearms.
 
Any chance of getting them out to the range? Use the "perhaps you should try shooting before dismissing it" argument. Even the hardest of liberals won't be able to deny the logic if they have the slightest bit of sense left in them.
Click to expand...

... and it is so because....? I don't understand the connection between "try shooting" and "not being able to deny the logic"? Why would "a hardest of liberal" won't be able to deny the logic, just because they've been to a range and tried shooting?

When I deciced to own and keep one (or more ;) ) at home, I told my wife and her reply was "then she better learn how to handle them and be able to shoot" if we were to have guns at home. That IS logic. It has nothing to do with being a "liberal" or whatever. The facts and fictions what make them oppose to keep guns at home not their liberal opinions. And of course, this is my opininon. :p

I took her to a nearby indoor range last weekend, despite of the attidue the covboy behind the desk had, we tried a compact, regular and a full size with 9s and .45s. I cannot tell she liked it or not but was convinced enough to signup for a private safety training course. That is a good start.

As for myself, I do not own a gun yet but I have ordered one today for under the pillow, so to say. In a month+ or so one for her pillow too :D I thank in advance for anyone who would contribute with answers to my upcoming many "naive" questions I may have. Here is the first one; what is the best gun to purchase which would fit my hand the best, never fails to fire, easy to conceal, doesn't need cleaning/maintenance, fool proof safe, stops the assailant, won't penetrate through the walls and umm... is cheap too? ;)
 
I'm assuming the guys weren't shooters before they got married. The "gun conversation" is one I have sooner rather than later with the women it starts to look like I'll be dating for a while.

Too big a hot button issue to leave unresolved, especially with me carrying constantly and my house being full of the things.
 
Sounds like you are about to tread on thin ice. You should give advice and ideas to your friends to present to their wives. Also remember that you don't know the reasons the wives don't want firearms around. It is their home too and they have every right to say NO.
Help your friends, but from a distance. Hope they keep your name out of the conversation with the wives or you could quickly become the bad guy.
 
I have a friend whose wife had him get rid of his rifle and his grandfather's shotgun when they got married. Now, he's asked if he can store a shotgun at my house so that he can shoot trap.

I don't think so. He has a house where he can store his firearms.
 
i got lucky. my wife loves to shoot. only problem is that she's always trying my guns. if she finds one of mine she likes, i have to buy her one like it.
 
My SO won't let me not have firearms. I'm still a bit uncomfortable with having a shotgun loaded in my bedroom, but boy do I sleep well at night.


When talking to her about when we move in together (soon, hopefully), I brought up that I'm unsure about firearms in the house other than in the safe.... she looked at me and said something along the lines of "Yeah, they'll save us from there. Good call. :neener: "
 
Thankfully I'll never be in their situation. There's no way that someone like their wives could even date me very long.
 
This is an easy one.

The wives are allowed to have products for "feminine protection," aren't they?

So the guys have some stuff for *masculine* protection.

Sure, guns are expensive, but at least you can re-use them.
 
I have the same "problem" as Craig. One of the first dates my Loving Wife and I went on was to shoot skeet! Now she goes hunting and shooting with me, it's been 20 years now. The woman have been listining to the media and other enlightened ones for all of their lives. The "gun talk" had better be soon or they will never accept the firearms as a part of their lives with the SO.

Oneshooter
Livin in Texas
 
I've always brought up guns no later than the second date. Firearms are about as much a part of my life as food and water, so I wouldn't even consider dating anyone who is anti-gun.

When I was 21 I met this gorgeous young lady. We went out on one date, and for our second I had her come to my apartment for dinner. Well I went to use the restroom and she picked up a gun magazine off of my table.

When I came out, she verbally attacked me, asked how many guns I had, then said that I shouldn't own guns because a friend of hers committed suicide with one. I told her to leave, and that was it.
 
When I first met my wife, she had never handled a firearm (except a bb gun). After dating for a few months I took her out to shoot 22's. She quickly earned the name of "can-killer". Now after 10 years of being together, she is always quick to point out my belt fed is in the way of her mirror or the 50 cal is preventing her from opening the closet, and boy lets not get started on all the ammo I have around. Gosh I love that woman. :evil:

As for her parents, being 3rd generation San Franciscans, they were in the belief guns were only for the military or police. Upon marriage of their daughter (and after they had gotten to know me for over 7 years) I finally invited them over to my house laid out all my toys and told them I was a collector. And that all my toys are in a safe and I follow the laws to the tee. Anyways, they still aren't "gun freaks" but they are more accepting now. And that is a lot.

My father did not want a firearm in his house, he even "stole" my first handgun after he found it and hid it away for over 6 months, I was tearing my hair out when I found out it was gone. I thought I left my door open and someone (guest) in the house stole it. Every time there was a murder on TV, I pictured it was with my handgun. After finding it, I sat down with my dad and told him I respected his opinion but was only going to buy a very small amount of firearms for collecting purposes. :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:

Thank god he never found out just how many I had.
 
This is why I flat out told my last GF on about the second or third date that I owned guns, and I was going to own guns long after we were married or she was gone. Of course after 4 years we aren't together anymore, I still have my guns, she's gone. I'll tell the next one the same thing. It's always best to get these types of things out front in the beginning before there is too much emotional involvement built up by either party.
 
Have them explain to their wives that they ARE going to buy a gun. Then, do it. They will bitch and moan. Deep down, women despise weak men.

Then, be prepared for 4-7 years of strife over this decision. In the end, they have guns and their respect.


-They need to get in touch with their masculine side.
 
Oh good golly.

I'm on the other end of this problem.

Don't let the first thing a woman find out about you be that you're a gunny. :(

I've had that experience twice. I went from being the dorky nice guy to being that evil gun owning SOB in the blink of an eye. :confused:

Just as well I suppose. I'd rather not have anything to do with anybody who judges me based on what I own rather than what I do.

In my experience, any given woman either #1. Hates guns and their owners with a passion or #2. Has more guns and shoots better than I do. Group #2 is hard to come by and they tend to be taken. :D

On the bright side, I do have my CHL class later this month. I noticed a lot of girls' names on the sign up sheet. :evil:
 
My advice is this.

DO NOT GET INVOLVED IN THIS SITUATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Do not get involved in conflict between husbands and wives. You will lose, and lose friends in the process.

For example, there's a reason why cops hate to respond to "domestic disturbances" the most. Usually, the husband and wife quit fighting each other and team up to both attack the third party.

Do not try to be "the helper" here.

Do not put yourself into this situation.

The outcomes will be bad, even if you think they are good on the surface.

Let your friends work their own situations out for themselves.

Offer support, for example, offer to take both the husband and the wife to the range once THEY agree between THEMSELVES that THEY want to go the range TOGETHER.

But do not attempt to be the one who gets THEM to the range.

Did I forget to mention to not get involved with this one?

hillbilly
 
If they've got the cash, tell them to just go and get one. Sounds like they don't need advice, just a lesson on how to stand up to their SOs.
Click to expand...
Thats pretty much what my original post said, although not quite as politely, so I edited it...

Don't let the first thing a woman find out about you be that you're a gunny.
Click to expand...
I agree it shouldnt be the first thing, however it needs to be high on the list IMO.
 
I've been waking up each day in wedded bliss for over 31 years now, and I'm so very glad that I never had to deal with this type of situation. My wife's pre and post-marriage attitude has always been, "Yeah, you have guns, so what, let's go get dinner." I raised two daughters to adulthood in this house full of guns, and neither one of them were ever wounded or maimed. I feel for the guys with the hung up, domineering, gun-o-phobe fraidy cats. If they're afraid of a gun in the house because they think that it'll suddenly spring to life and wreak havoc, they'd also better remove the kitchen knives, scissors, flower pots, baseball bats, and heavy glass ashtrays from the premises.
 
I feel for those guys, I would never marry a woman that wouldn't let me keep my hobbies. Plus the Gallup poll says that 1 in 3 women own a firearm, so go find that one in three.

I am not sure how you convince a anti SO, but perhaps start taking up hunting, firearms used in hunting are looked at differently than ones used for self protection. Cowboy shooting is getting pretty popular, IIRC its is the fastest growing sport currently, percentage wise. Maybe have your friends take their wives as a spectators at one of those events. I don't really know how to handle that situation I just avoid the anti woman like the plague.

Charby
 
!. What Hillbilly said - don't get involved, you really don't want to be in the middle of 'a situation'.

2. If you must, do it from a distance, coach your friend, help with documenation, facts, & strategy (there's tons of links kickin around here, e.g. Guntruths.com). Do what you can to find out what the issues are, deal with them, get past the emotion.

3. If it's early in the relationship, get it out ASAP and then make a decision - girl or guns. There are plenty of women who are: a) enthusiastic about firearms, b) tolerant of firearms, or c) at least ambivalent about guns. Stay away from the hoplophobes, blissninnies, and other idiots.

4. If you're already in over your head - you still have to make a decision. Maybe a testosterone patch or two would help.
 
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