Sorry, this post is real personal and I have been feeling really bad and worried today and I going to come out in the open and reveal some things about me and my situation in life. I am not one of those guys who feels he has something to prove or has to play off being somebody I am not. Hopefully, I can find some people who can give me their advice and lend a shoulder to lean on as I tell them my situation.
Well, I just recently got into guns during the Obama election, for fear it may have been my final opportunity to own many guns. I bought some rifles and handguns. I have been pro-2A for many years and supporting the cause, but never got involved in shooting myself. I come from a background, where my ancestors were deprived of guns and it cost many of their lives in EUrope, for the last 1000 years. Especially in the last 70 years, my ancestors suffered greatly from lack of guns and had their gun rights taken from them, so they could easily be exterminated. I am grateful to be in USA where I have freedoms my ancestors never had, which they never could dream.
Well, to the point.. I lived a very bad life for the first 20 years of my life. I was not a good person and I had a real problem with my temper. I never handled things the right way. I was stupid kid and I toyed around with things I should have not. I had plenty of whoopings, but I was so bad, it never helped. You can say, I was not a good son or brother; I was not good to my family.
Later in my life I changed, found God and took up a career and have been helping my family. I made amends and try to heal up the open wounds. However ,the past with my anger and temper I regret. I know guns and tempers dont mix. My parents told me never to own a gun, since they had memories of my past life. They always have been a bit fearful of guns, due to buying into some of the anti-gun propaganda, especially my mother. She is a liberal and my father is a conservative. Now I can say, I have improved my life greatly and have successful career now and live to as high of a moral standard as I can. However ,time to time my temper I dont like.
I am 31 years old, by the way.. But I have lot of love for my family. For the longest time I refused to own a gun, becaues I knew my parents would not like it. I do not live with them and I am not dependant on them. My parents are actually dependant on me, partially, since I am a very important asset to family business. I am a software developer and they are in need of my help. I have financial leverage on my side now, but still have that honor and love which son has for parents.
I know that I must overcome my weaknesses and I cannot make myself a slave to my emotions. Also, I must respect the power and danger of firearms and know that I must be a more noble and of a higher virtue for owning them.
Well, after months of lying, trying to cover my tracks, making up stories where I was during the day, when I was called at the range, I finally did what my heart felt I needed to do. I called up my father and told him I was not out in the woods hiking, instead, today I was at the gun range going for orientation and to do some shooting. My heart was fearful and I was afraid he may condemn me for partaking in a hobby he told me in the past I should not do.
His reaction was very surprising. He did not condemn me, but he said he was happy I am partaking in social activity and that I am learning to shoot with ohters. He said he always dreamed of shooting guns and thought it be real exciting. He told me when he comes up to visit me, he wanted to come and shoot with me. When he said this, it nearly brought tears to my eyes. I also remember the past and how I hurt him and know that I rather die, than make him upset again.
I want to prove to my father I can be noble and I want all my bad traits from the past crushed. I hate that temper and want it gone for good. I would love my father to be a firearm enthusiast like I am becoming and for him to have a hobby too. He spends most of day pressured with his job, pleasing my mother and has little outdoor time or social life. He needs some enjoyment time and I feel it would be a wonderful hobby for him. I want to make a good impression on him with guns. Sometimes I Feel because of my past, I should not be the person. But, what can I do to build his enthusiasm for shooting? He is kind of anti-social, I doubt he would just go to range without someone like me to show him.
When I told him I own ARs and pistols, he seemed a bit shocked. He probably thought at first I just had a .22. Maybe i should have just stayed silent, but I hate lying to my father. Oh well, I also fear he may say these are bad guns, maybe I should not own them. Of course I am speculating still. Perhaps he will respect them for what they are. He is conservative politically and a war veteran. He respects 2A rights. I don't want to intimidate him though thinking I turned into some crazy gun freak, owning all these "assault" weapons. I wish now I would have saved some money for some "good guns", like some antique or wood hunting rifles.. But I am too broke to get one.
Sorry for sobbing and being emotional... My love affair with guns and freedom and my family is a tough issue. I thought a place like High Road would be good place to speak about this issue. Although, I am sure a spiritual advisor will also be needed. I am feeling bit sad, I feel a lot of guilt, I would like being a gun owner to result in me being a more responsible and repsecful person. The last thing I want to do is to sell my guns and be another helpless person.
Thanks for anyone who is listening.. God bless
Well, I just recently got into guns during the Obama election, for fear it may have been my final opportunity to own many guns. I bought some rifles and handguns. I have been pro-2A for many years and supporting the cause, but never got involved in shooting myself. I come from a background, where my ancestors were deprived of guns and it cost many of their lives in EUrope, for the last 1000 years. Especially in the last 70 years, my ancestors suffered greatly from lack of guns and had their gun rights taken from them, so they could easily be exterminated. I am grateful to be in USA where I have freedoms my ancestors never had, which they never could dream.
Well, to the point.. I lived a very bad life for the first 20 years of my life. I was not a good person and I had a real problem with my temper. I never handled things the right way. I was stupid kid and I toyed around with things I should have not. I had plenty of whoopings, but I was so bad, it never helped. You can say, I was not a good son or brother; I was not good to my family.
Later in my life I changed, found God and took up a career and have been helping my family. I made amends and try to heal up the open wounds. However ,the past with my anger and temper I regret. I know guns and tempers dont mix. My parents told me never to own a gun, since they had memories of my past life. They always have been a bit fearful of guns, due to buying into some of the anti-gun propaganda, especially my mother. She is a liberal and my father is a conservative. Now I can say, I have improved my life greatly and have successful career now and live to as high of a moral standard as I can. However ,time to time my temper I dont like.
I am 31 years old, by the way.. But I have lot of love for my family. For the longest time I refused to own a gun, becaues I knew my parents would not like it. I do not live with them and I am not dependant on them. My parents are actually dependant on me, partially, since I am a very important asset to family business. I am a software developer and they are in need of my help. I have financial leverage on my side now, but still have that honor and love which son has for parents.
I know that I must overcome my weaknesses and I cannot make myself a slave to my emotions. Also, I must respect the power and danger of firearms and know that I must be a more noble and of a higher virtue for owning them.
Well, after months of lying, trying to cover my tracks, making up stories where I was during the day, when I was called at the range, I finally did what my heart felt I needed to do. I called up my father and told him I was not out in the woods hiking, instead, today I was at the gun range going for orientation and to do some shooting. My heart was fearful and I was afraid he may condemn me for partaking in a hobby he told me in the past I should not do.
His reaction was very surprising. He did not condemn me, but he said he was happy I am partaking in social activity and that I am learning to shoot with ohters. He said he always dreamed of shooting guns and thought it be real exciting. He told me when he comes up to visit me, he wanted to come and shoot with me. When he said this, it nearly brought tears to my eyes. I also remember the past and how I hurt him and know that I rather die, than make him upset again.
I want to prove to my father I can be noble and I want all my bad traits from the past crushed. I hate that temper and want it gone for good. I would love my father to be a firearm enthusiast like I am becoming and for him to have a hobby too. He spends most of day pressured with his job, pleasing my mother and has little outdoor time or social life. He needs some enjoyment time and I feel it would be a wonderful hobby for him. I want to make a good impression on him with guns. Sometimes I Feel because of my past, I should not be the person. But, what can I do to build his enthusiasm for shooting? He is kind of anti-social, I doubt he would just go to range without someone like me to show him.
When I told him I own ARs and pistols, he seemed a bit shocked. He probably thought at first I just had a .22. Maybe i should have just stayed silent, but I hate lying to my father. Oh well, I also fear he may say these are bad guns, maybe I should not own them. Of course I am speculating still. Perhaps he will respect them for what they are. He is conservative politically and a war veteran. He respects 2A rights. I don't want to intimidate him though thinking I turned into some crazy gun freak, owning all these "assault" weapons. I wish now I would have saved some money for some "good guns", like some antique or wood hunting rifles.. But I am too broke to get one.
Sorry for sobbing and being emotional... My love affair with guns and freedom and my family is a tough issue. I thought a place like High Road would be good place to speak about this issue. Although, I am sure a spiritual advisor will also be needed. I am feeling bit sad, I feel a lot of guilt, I would like being a gun owner to result in me being a more responsible and repsecful person. The last thing I want to do is to sell my guns and be another helpless person.
Thanks for anyone who is listening.. God bless
