Is your interest in guns just a "bang fetish"

[AStone]

^^ The last three posts offer me hope. <sarcasm>

OK, so let's focus back on "bang fetish".

That's where this problem began,
or at least the realization that there is a problem here.

(In reality, I should have remembered this nut job from 35 years ago.)

 

[buckhorn_cortez]

Sounds to me like you need to modify your plan. Get a job and then get out of there. You can always make more money - but, you may have to alter your current plans to fit the new situation.

In the mean time, avoid her as much as possible. Be nice, be helpful (make coffee in the morning, do the dishes, clean the bathroom, vacuum, etc.) AND be non-confrontational. It's really hard to not like someone who works so hard and is just plain "nice."

If she starts on one of her rants - politely excuse yourself and leave the area. Go to your room (if you have one), go for a walk - whatever to get away from her.

If she insists on discussing guns again, and you can't get out of the situation. Just say, "I'd rather not discuss that subject. It seems to upset you and I don't want to do that." Then change the conversation. If that doesn't work - then excuse yourself and leave the room.

Sooner or later, she'll figure out that she isn't getting anywhere with her rants because you refuse to participate.

If she ever wants to discuss it rationally - then do that and offer to take her shooting so that she'll have a better understanding of why you like to shoot - it's fun.

If she won't do that, then just tell her that you recognize that you both have opposite opinions and it would probably be better for both you to not discuss the subject because you can see how much stress that causes for her.

Attempting to engage in meaningful conversation with some people often isn't worth the investment in time.

One tactic you can use is to feign ignorance and make her explain everything. "Bang fetish?" "I have no idea what that is or what that means." "Can you explain that to me?"

As she attempts to explain things keep making her explain more and more...and when she gets really convoluted...just say..."Well, I'm afraid you've lost me."

If you can stand more of the farce...ask her to start over...always make sure you thoroughly question any and all logic disconnects by making her explain them.

At any point...you can use the bailout "I'm afraid you've lost me on that one...I just don't can't seem to follow your thinking..."

Then you can bail out by "having to do the dishes," 'have to take a shower," "have to wax my boots," "have to go to bathroom..." etc.

Approach it like Bruce Lee in "Enter the Dragon," It's the art of fighting without fighting."

 

[AStone]

Get a job and then get out of there.

I'm self employed.

And a gun owner:
two rifles and a pistol.

 

[Red Wind]

A man with 24,000 posts on THR has got nerve, verve, style and staying power! Capable of the most audacious things, other than maybe leaping tall buildings at a single bound!

Are you in Florida?

 

[AStone]

Yes. North central.

 

[Red Wind]

Probably horse country. Ocala, Gainesville. You have a serious dilemma with this gun hating woman. Are you light enough to ride a horse for workouts?

 

[buckhorn_cortez]

I'm self employed.

Then do some work and make some money - unless what you really mean is that you're self unemployed...and want to stay that way.

And a gun owner:
two rifles and a pistol.

I fail to see why that's even germane to the conversation...it almost seems like you want owning three guns to be a problem. I can leave three guns hidden in any of my vehicles.

I'm unemployed and have somewhere around 60+ guns...if that makes any difference in the conversation. Dealing with 60+ guns, THAT would be problem.

 

[AStone]

Are you light enough to ride a horse for workouts?

Light enough to carry two with a backpack walking .. with no 'bang fetish'.

 

[Red Wind]

With no vehicle or homestead, your guns are a problem, not to mention all of the basics of everyday living without wandering the streets. That is out.

A real job, as Buck has suggested, seems to be the only real solution. other than sticking out the ordeal with this most difficult lady for many months.

 

[kozak6]

"Bang Fetish?" That's a little unfair. Suppressor ownership is difficult and expensive.

My wallet wishes I had a "bang fetish". Firecrackers are MUCH cheaper than ammo .

 

[AStone]

A real job, as Buck has suggested, seems to be the only real solution. other than sticking out the ordeal with this most difficult lady for many months.

I came here at their invitation to live and work in their cabin for free because they expressed a lot of interest (including a few thousand $ investment) in my work, so that I could have a comfortable, stress-free place to work on my business -- that I have been earning my living with for 15 years (exclusively; no other jobs) -- for a period of months without having to worry about paying rent.

What I intend (intended?) to do is take the business to the next level. We -- my professional associates and I (which do not include my current hosts) -- understand exactly what needs to be done, including further web site development and video production -- which I am fully equipped to do with both tools and skills -- I just needed the time and space to do it, again without having to be actively engaged in earning money so that I can focus on those issues. We are convinced that we have an exciting product/service that is marketable once we have better marketing-advertising, which requires (first) more web site development (in particular, merging two sites into one, and adding a point of sale page) and video production (what we do is educational in nature). I will not discuss the nature of the work here -- it's not directly related to THR's mission (even though it does involve firearms and blades as one set of tools for one of our two components).

Getting a "real job" will be counter productive toward that work, which is my life's work, my passion about which I feel very strongly.

In light of day, I'm going to try to find a way to resolve this issue. One of my associates is a professional counselor and mediator, who works with people to resolve conflicts (he's done consulting work for both IBM and NASA, for example). I'm in the process of engaging him about these issues, including the 'gun fetish' issue (he is a gun owner and ardent supporter of 2A). We'll see where this goes.

 

[Robert]

This has drifted way outside the scope of THR.