Or are we gonna rely on whatever police and other LE orgs say is good because they're the final say on what's good/bad for self defense now?
I do not know of any LE organizations who recommend anything smaller than the service calibers.
I know that the .380 Auto is not among those, that it is generally considered the minimum for SD, and that it is marginal at that.
While some writers citing observed penetration numbers opine that the .32 ACP is not "that bad", or words to that effect, I am aware of no one who actually responsibly recommends the .32 ACP for primary carry, if at all, for SD.
For LE use, the conclusions of users and departments specify certain minimum and maximum penetration performance through specified media and barriers; they state a preference for about 50% expansion,
starting with an unexpanded bullet size of .356 or more.
There are loads that are advertised to meet those standards. To my knowledge, they include some premium JHP loads for the .38 Special and 9mm, and for the larger service calibers.
I would not want to bet my life on some internet demos of any cartridges, or on any lay person's conclusion that the .32 ACP seems to be about as good as the .380 Auto.
I carry a .380 Auto for backup. I consider it marginal, and I carry it only because the much lighter weight and smaller size allow me to carry it
in addition to a service caliber handgun. It's a judgment call.
I can see choosing a .380 Auto when a very light, small handgun is needed. There are 9mm pistols in that size range, but I would not want to try one in realistic defensive shooting drills in a class, because the recoil slows the rate of controlled fire.
There are those who choose the .32 ACP for that purpose. I am not one of them. My LCP Max is small enough and light enough for me. I do not expect to ever have to use it, but if I do, it would probably be at a very short distance indeed--say, inside an automobile, and without metal or glass barriers.