Carrying Into Other People's Homes

[General Geoff]

Since I open carry mostly, anyone whose house I enter will know I'm carrying fairly obviously.

That said, if I was carrying concealed, it makes as much sense to inform the homeowner that I'm carrying a folding knife, or a set of keys, or wearing polka dot underwear. I just don't see it as important or necessary information.

Would you like it if someone you didn't know very well came to your house armed to the hilt and didn't give you the respect or the choice?

I don't see why I would care, or why telling me somehow equates to respect. If you're armed, I assume you have your reasons and that those reasons do not involve hurting me. Telling me doesn't change that, so I consider it a waste of time.

Look at it this way. Do you honestly expect a person who means you harm, who is armed, to tell you he is armed before entering your house?

 

[THE DARK KNIGHT]

That said, if I was carrying concealed, it makes as much sense to inform the homeowner that I'm carrying a folding knife, or a set of keys, or wearing polka dot underwear. I just don't see it as important or necessary information.

Yes, because keys and pocket knives are certainly just as effective weapons as a handgun...Come on you can't be serious with this example.

 

[Joe Demko]

I expect the people I invite into my home to abide by my rules so out of respect for my friends I abide by their rules as well. If I feel the NEED to carry in my friends home then I need new friends.

Exactly right.

 

[General Geoff]

Yes, because keys and pocket knives are certainly just as effective weapons as a handgun...Come on you can't be serious with this example.

I am quite serious. As we all know, a handgun is merely a tool. It has no will of its own. It is the possessor of said handgun who determines how it is used or not used. And generally, anyone I invite into my home is someone I trust to carry a gun.

I guess it's just that I assume everyone is armed, and don't consider it some kind of peculiarity that needs to be declared in any normal circumstance.

If I feel the NEED to carry in my friends home then I need new friends.

"If I feel the NEED to carry <insert any time or place> then I need <to avoid said place>."

Guess you shouldn't be carrying anywhere..?

 

[coloradokevin]

I also go "Don't ask, don't tell" on this one... Unless it is the home of one of my shooting buddies, or anyone who has known me for more than about half an hour. Those folks pretty much already know that I'm carrying.

Admittedly, the fact that I work in LE does help smooth things over with my more liberal and anti-gun friends. Apparently I'm an exception to their anti-gun rules because of my job.

 

[THE DARK KNIGHT]

I am quite serious. As we all know, a handgun is merely a tool. It has no will of its own. It is the possessor of said handgun who determines how it is used or not used. And generally, anyone I invite into my home is someone I trust to carry a gun.

Understood. But tell me, honestly, you don't seriously think a set of keys is as effective of a weapon as a handgun, do you?

 

[General Geoff]

Understood. But tell me, honestly, you don't seriously think a set of keys is as effective of a weapon as a handgun, do you?

Why does that matter?

Lots of folks park their cars right outside my house, they could easily plow into my house and kill me. A car is a far more potent weapon than any small arm, and I bet you don't feel disrespected when people pull up to your house in their 4,000lb projectiles of death, without specifically informing you "I am a driver and I have a car."

 

[THE DARK KNIGHT]

Why does that matter?

Lots of folks park their cars right outside my house, they could easily plow into my house and kill me. A car is a far more potent weapon than any small arm, and I bet you don't feel disrespected when people pull up to your house in their 4,000lb projectiles of death, without specifically informing you "I am a driver and I have a car."

All right, I'm not gonna sit here and play games with you all day. You go on pretending silly things and I'll go on laughing at you. have a nice day buddy, and careful when crossing the street.

 

[General Geoff]

You go on pretending silly things and I'll go on laughing at you.

What am I pretending? That it's prudent to assume everyone is armed?


I consider it far more comical to get upset when someone doesn't explicitly inform you that they're armed before entering your home.

 

[Mr.Davis]

are we talking about carrying or pilfering their jewelry? what do you mean by getting "caught"

Some people have emotional, illogical objections to others carrying guns. Beyond that, it's downright unusual to most folks.

It's possible that if you'll be "made" while carrying in someone else's house. I'd bet the average person will instinctively object and demand an explanation. When something hidden is revealed, the immediate question most would as is "why are you trying to hide that from me?"

Not everyone, when confronted about carrying, is going to say "Goodbye, you gun-hating lib'rul! My right to carry a gun must never be questioned by the likes of you!"

It's reasonable to assume that if someone is visiting another person's home, they are interested maintaining a relationship with them. It's prudent to be prepared to give a measured, well-reasoned answer just in case.

My suggestion, if discovered and questioned, is to be direct and empathetic. "I understand why you're asking about my gun. I have a concealed carry permit, and always carry a gun where it's legal to protect me and my family. I don't feel comfortable leaving a gun unattended in a car, but if you'd like me to take it outside, I will."

 

[Joe Demko]

Guess you shouldn't be carrying anywhere..?

I don't react well to condescension, so if you want to continue the conversation you'll go ahead and lose that.

I carry most of the time. I also recognize that my life and the people I associate with are such that my real risk of being attacked in my friend's living room or driveway approaches zero. Accordingly, for my friends who object to the presence of a weapon in their homes, I do not carry there. YMMV, but although I prefer to be armed, I don't need a gun just to get through my daily life.

 

[Mr.Davis]

All right, I'm not gonna sit here and play games with you all day. You go on pretending silly things and I'll go on laughing at you. have a nice day buddy, and careful when crossing the street.

His point is valid. For some reason, you think a gun is more dangerous than a car or knife. How many car accidents do you hear about per day? How many firearms accidents? Do you think the average driver is more or less attentive when driving than the average shooter is when shooting?

I don't understand the weird stigma about guns that gun owners have. I get why Joe Blow is scared of guns. I just don't understand why a gun person is afraid to have his own friend carrying a gun in a holster.

 

[BeerSleeper]

The contents of my pants are my business.

The closer I am with any given friend, the greater degree they are permitted to be involved in my business.

None are that close. (presently irrelevant anyway, I mostly only car-carry)

 

[General Geoff]

I don't react well to condescending, so if you want to continue the conversation you'll go ahead and lose that.

It was not my intention to be condescending, I merely am pointing out that bad situations can arise anywhere, a friend's house is not magically immune to violence. If you feel it's worth your time and effort to disarm specifically to enter a friend's house, good for you. In my opinion, I'd more readily just avoid visiting said friend because of his illogical disapproval of guns in his home.

 

[Alberforth]

The host sets the terms. This means that your judgment of what ought to be okay isn't relevant: it's not your home.

You really do owe a duty to the host to abide by their rules. Avoiding the issue by not bringing it up is using the host's ignorance as a veil for you to do something you know they may not want.

Imagine "don't ask, don't' tell" with any number of other issues, for instance alcohol--would you argue that it's fine to bring a bottle of your favorite refreshment hidden so you can have a little on the side when going to the home of someone who is completely against it and wants none in their home?

The host sets the terms, and that right even extends to being wrong about things.

 

[gatorjames85]

I don't bring it up usually, but none of my closest friends care. If I need to readjust, I can do so without anyone objecting.

 

[bearcreek]

When I get up in the morning I put on my underwear, pants, shirt, socks, belt, gun, and knife. I do it every day, it's a habit and it would feel weird not putting on one of those things. My gun is a hell of a lot safer on my belt than it is in the car. If someone has specifically stated that they do not want me carrying in their home then I decide if it's worth taking off what I consider to be part of my wardrobe to accommodate their illogical fears. Usually that means I'm not interested in being at their home to begin with so it's kind of a self fixing problem. As far as someone coming into my home with a concealed handgun. If I have any reason whatsoever to believe they're not to be trusted with a firearm, they're not coming in, with or without one. It's like any of the other supposed "gun free zones". If someone has criminal activity in mind they're not going to follow the signs anyway, thereby making the signs and such rules redundant and useless for their intended purpose.

 

[General Geoff]

The host sets the terms, and that right even extends to being wrong about things.

I agree completely. What I don't agree with is assuming guns are an issue in the first place.

If a host makes it clear to me that firearms are not allowed, I'll gadly leave them in peace or not enter at all if they tell me ahead of time. But given the multitude of personal effects that people may carry on them, I don't generally think to ask if guns in particular are verboten in any given household.

 

[Robert]

"If I feel the NEED to carry <insert any time or place> then I need <to avoid said place>."

Guess you shouldn't be carrying anywhere..?

You vastly over simplify the point. The point is, when I go into a home I generally know the person well. Most of my friends know I carry and are fine with me carrying in their home. I do not know the people at the grocery store, gas station, liquor store, theater, or at the park. So yes I will carry when I go out. I may not carry if I am going to a friend's house without stopping on the way there or back.

I respect my friends, of all trains of thought, enough to respect their wishes. If that somehow makes me a bad person on the internet then so be it.

 

[TexasRifleman]

Imagine "don't ask, don't' tell" with any number of other issues, for instance alcohol--would you argue that it's fine to bring a bottle of your favorite refreshment hidden so you can have a little on the side when going to the home of someone who is completely against it and wants none in their home?

The host sets the terms, and that right even extends to being wrong about things.

Where does this end though? How much deference do you owe your host on matters of a private nature? Do you discuss all the possibilities up front?

Say you know your host is a member of some religious group, for discussions sake, that does not believe in lacy underwear for women. Would you insist that your wife only wear certain types of underwear to a party at the friends home?

Or, more likely, would you make the decision that since your host won't be seeing your wifes underwear that it doesn't matter what she wears.

So what's the difference with a firearm? Unless you plan on drawing down in the living room why would they ever be aware that you are carrying it? Walking through the front door carrying a six pack of Bud and discretely wearing a hidden handgun are not remotely the same thing.

I have a friend that hates Fords but I park my F150 in his driveway on a fairly regular basis. Should I park in the street next time? I understand the point being made about respecting your friends property, I'm just wondering where the line is?

 

[Robert]

TR,
I agree with you in theory. But to me it is just an issue of respecting a man's home. Highlanders, upon entering a home, turned over their pistols, dirk, and sword out of a sign of respect to the home owner. It also showed that you trusted the homeowner to protect, of give back your arms, in a time of need. The traveler was allowed to keep his sgian dubh as a sign that homeowner trusted the traveler and so he would not be totally disarmed. Though they were placed in the sock so as to be open for all to see.

 

[cambeul41]

I expect the people I invite into my home to abide by my rules

The host sets the terms,

Okay if the rules are posted and the terms are set. If not, should I carry a check list of things to inquire about? I have known people to be skittish about my pocket knife.

 

[ObsidianOne]

Very interesting variety of responses.
However, I feel somewhat hung up in the middle.
On the one hand, I carry everywhere I go.
On the other, I feel like I'm offending someone who is "gun-shy" by carrying into their home.
And as far as the responses go about the car being a bigger threat, I absolutely agree.
To the person who said that they don't think there is danger in their friend's house or in their driveway, I've got a story that suggests otherwise.
I have one friend who is lucky to be alive today when a group of people showed up in the back of a pickup truck with hammers and crowbars and beat him and his friends nearly to death on his front porch. Why? They got the wrong house and wouldn't listen to reason.
The police got there AFTER they left, and AFTER the ambulance.

 

[Claude Clay]

the gun stays on me. on me; not in a coat that get hung in a closet. dress according to the occassion. if invited to a friend who has a pool, if in doubt about their ways---lock it in your car.

 

[kayak-man]

Most of the people who's house's I go to know me well enough that while they may be uncomfortable if some individuals carrying, would have no issue with me being armed so long as it stays in the holster.

A few people may object to it, but it would be more of a "Do you really gun?" than "Get it out of my house," and I have a feeling that if they found latter I had been carrying they wouldn't really care.

Place of work on the other hand...

Chris "the Kayak-Man" Johnson