Friends' wives won't let them have guns....

Status
Not open for further replies.
I am married to a very easy going woman. Her dad was a gunsmith and took her shooting as a child. Well, she does not want to go shooting anymore but she lets me alone with my past time so long as the bills get paid.

I didn't marry my mommy and I'll be damned if anyone on the planet is going to dictate. I don't do it and I sure as heck am not going to tolerate it.

Marriage is the art of compromise. The "I said so" routine would have me out the door quicker than you can say Tom Robinson! Life is too short for the grief.

If you are not married you had better find out up front what her/his attitudes are towards firearms. Also watch out for the vindictive who will say you threatened them just to get your firearms pulled. I have seen it happen.

Best of luck to the married fellas who get told what to do. Life just can't be like that for me. Sounds pretty unpleasant! :cool:
 
Hey guys... here is a plea that we get back on topic. It's fun to vent about controlling spouses, etc..., but the original question was asking for help to convert a couple of people to the pro-gun position. We'd all benefit from that, especially because they are women and therefore have more instant credibility with any anti's they might meet/convert in the future. How about we assume for the moment that they aren't control freaks, just unfamiliar with guns, and therefore afraid of them.

Any more examples/suggestions on how to wean them off the fear of gun?

I confess to not have read every post in this thread so I beg forgiveness if this has already been covered but in my humble opinion the answer to your question lies within the following statement, e.g. "...just unfamiliar with guns, and therefore afraid of them..."

You have got to take these fine folks to the range and get them involved! Start with a .22LR and only go up in caliber if things go well. I've never taken anybody to the range who was an "anti" and not have them have a positive experience.

The results are likely to be even more positive if you can take them to some out of the way place where they can do some fun plinking. Bring some fun, "reactive", targets such as fruit, vegetables, etc. The lack of "peer pressure" combined with exploding watermelons... hard to imagine someone who wouldn't get a kick out of that; however "anti" they might be initially.

Once someone has had some fun with firearms they are much more likely to consider alternative uses for the weapon.
 
I have a few friends who have commented to me that they would like to get a firearm or two (or twelve ) but their wives/girlfriends won't let them purchase one.

Won't let them?? How humorous! Too bad such people are led around and controlled in such a way. Why someone would ever allow another to make decisions for them is beyond me.

PATH said it best:

I didn't marry my mommy and I'll be damned if anyone on the planet is going to dictate. I don't do it and I sure as heck am not going to tolerate it.
 
Just my .017 €... ;)

Most often the soundest advice is to stay the heck away from any such discussion between a man and wife. But, if one were able to judge such a situation so that it would to the best of one's knowledge be possible to help by intervening, there should be no problem putting oneself on the line.

I mean, what are friends for if not for the role of the scapegoat who the wife has all right to accost as much as she likes, as long as it takes pressure off my buddy? She'll get around to liking me quite enough some day again. Or then not, but it's my friend I'm supposed to be supporting in the end.
 
Some people cannot be reached thru logic and reason. If the wives won't listen to common sense, the husbands have a big decision to make.No one can make it for them. Just my $0.02 worth.
 
Thier wives won't let them get one?

Hmmm....

It sounds like what they need is a set of attached male genitalia. Perhaps they should ask the wives if they can have those back, first. :neener:

My ex-wife once threatened that she'd divorce me if I brought a gun into our house. My response? "Don't let the door hit you on your way out." I've never let a woman hand me an ultimatum. Forget that. :fire:

Women are nice, but the guns you buy will still be functioning perfectly long after they've gained weight, grown ugly, and aren't good for squat except pestering you for the remote control so they can watch Jeopardy.
 
I have to admit that I've been assuming the ultimatum that ITG's friends have been given is probably missing some details, or there is an implied reason that we haven't heard about.

It could be something as simple as "I have this unreasonable fear of guns and whenever I know that I'm around one I start to go into convulsions." The long and short of it is that nobody else knows, and in order to get to the desired endpoint (gun ownership), ITG's friends need to first have a strong communication channel with their spouses. For everybody who says "It's all about the power in the relationship"; "grow a pair"; "Find a new wife", etc-- those responses ensure that the issue remains about who is in control.

A lot of responders have indicated their own ultimatum (implied or otherwise): "Don't try to limit my gun activities"; "I'll do whatever I want", etc. This is just the other extreme from ITG's friends.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I believe that every singe one of us has some things that they view as non-negotiable behavior expectations, whether they are: fiduciary responsibility, fidelity, sharing home responsibilities, refilling the gas tank when it gets below 1/4, no guns in house, or non-interference with ccw. I believe that everybody has something that they view as non-negotiable in their relationship.

ITG's friends are going to need to understand their spouses' concerns/issues before they can make positive changes.

I think I'm not as lucky as some who have posted in that my wife hasn't taken me up on my offers to go shoot, but she doesn't oppose having guns in the house. (Like an earlier poster I'm very frugal, and sometimes have to get a fair amount of "encouragement" to go spend some money.)

Marriage isn't about control, it's about sharing a journey, cooperating, and learning.

Oh well, that's my $.02
 
my sisters husband is that way, he does not want her to have a gun

Mine was the same way..fine for him, but not for me. Go figure.

My SIL has never been crazy about my brother's guns, but mostly for safety reasons and I think that's ok. I'm not sure he's always responsible enough with them with his kids around, so I don't have a problem with her drawing the line about them staying locked up unless they're in use.

On the other hand, she's willingly gone shooting with me a few times to try to get accustomed to guns and I think that says a lot..she doesn't like them, but she's willing to try to compromise about them as long as her kids aren't at risk (she's also asked me to get them some training, too, and we're going to do that this summer.)
 
but their wives/girlfriends won't let them purchase one

What was the first human-made artifact to exceed the speed of sound?

(sound of whip cracking)

Now we know the occasion, too.
 
Gd

I got in trouble when I married my wife for not having a firearm. Now I am a collector! That'll teach the inlaws!
:neener:
 
Just a coupla thoughts on women and guns

Hiya - I'm a woman who has done a 360 on the whole issue of guns. Those of us who were raised by leftists were raised to fetishize firearms, and it's a powerful spell to break. We imbue them with powers they don't have. We are fed lies about how all guns are used against their owners, etc. and soforth. So, here's what I would tell a male friend in this situation (and those of you who said not to get directly involved are right, in my opinion) -

One: Explain basic safety rules to your woman. Explain that guns don't get up while you're sleeping, load themselves, and do bad things. My husband has 10 or more guns, I hardly know they're in the house and I certainly never worry about them growing legs.

Two: Perhaps gather up some stats to counter the lies told by the leftist media. I'm sure that these aren't hard to find. One that I found is that more people drown in bathtubs every year in America than are accidentally wounded by firearms. Dude, the bathtub is more dangerous than a semi-automatic.

Three: She doesn't own the flipping household. You are a team. You have every right to own any object you wish, barring eggregious safety violations. Mike is right - if she doesn't understand this, and she's your girlfriend, don't marry her until she does. If she's your wife, well, sheez, that's a tough situation, because I suspect she's a controlling you-know-what in other ways, also.

Four: If you can talk her into it, take her to a range. Once you shoot a gun, they lose the magical powers in your head and just become . . . . fun!

One last thought. Dave is also right, most women don't much care for weak men. That doesn't mean we like to be bossed around or treated as helpless, either. But I am so tired of women who think that they can treat men like little boys and then have them respect and love us. Sheez-us!
 
Good to get the perspective of someone on the other side of the issue.

I'd say the advice of 'Grow a pair' works on the girlfriend part. I do not approve of couples that are dating having any control in the others life. It is not a time to try and change one another to your wants, but to see if the two personalities will work. The girl saying guns are completely out of the question, just tells me that compromise later will be almost nill.

Married couples, much harder to say. Obviously, some more discretion is advisable there, there is much more to lose.
 
This thread astounds me. Since when does a wife have veto power over her husband? Few women hate guns more than my wife, but she knows that my decision to own guns has the same validity as her decision not to. Her only concern, which is legitimate, is that I secure them so that our children (now grandchildren) do not have access to them.(Check out the GunVault Mini-Vault as great compromise between safety and accessability.) She asks that I not discuss gun subjects with her, and that is not too much to ask. When I was a motorcycle instructor I used to joke that there are only two kinds of men, those with motorcycles and those whose wives won't let them have one. It seems maybe the same joke applies to guns.
 
Actually, I have some positive news to announce.

One friend, the one with a GF (might as well be married, since they bought a house together), told me earlier this weekend that he is getting his dads shotgun. His GF doesn't get any say either. :D

It will before he gets his CHL (which he wants), or an EBR, but it is a good start.

I.G.B.
 
Ditch the bitch and go celebrate by buying as many as you can fit in the trunk of a l962 Lincoln :)
 
Good news for anyone concerned

The next generation (to me) is not appearing to have such a big problem with this. I know three girls well: The first supports having guns, my GF (technically she's not, but should be tomorrow if I hear what I want to hear) wants me to show her how with my airsoft guns in the backyard, and the third I have already shown with the airsoft. 3/3.
 
My ex-wife once told me,"Either those guns go,or I go."7 years later ,you see who did what.Best decision I ever made. :D
 
Can't help you, friend. A lady told me on a date that no guns were ever allowed in her home. I told her that I would never cross her threshhold.

Last lady that I seriously dated, decided that I could not afford my firearms purchasing habits and her. I told her that she was probably right...goodbye.

I've got guns. I'm going to keep guns. I'm going to buy more guns. To date, I haven't seen any women personally, or in all the various media that are going to tell me I'm not under any circumstances.

I've seen women who could probably convince me to do things that I would not normally do. I've not seen a single one who could stop me from doing what I want to do.
 
late at night run up to her door and bang on the door then run down to the corner and use the pay phone and call her and tell her you are just outside and you are waiting till she goes to sleep.

a couple nights of this nad she will be asking you to sell her a gun.









kidding sorta
 
wow this is a long thread. i only read the first page so forgive me if i've missed anything important. i'm a woman (and a :what: liberal) and i love guns. i've been interested in them since i was a teenager, but it wasnt til my early 30's that i started to shoot. my bf likes them as well, and i always told him "lets go to the range some day and shoot..lets go to the range..lets go to the range". and he would always say sure we should do that sometime. finally i saw that if i left it to him it would never happen, so i called up and booked us both for the beginner gun users class. we went to that, and it included an hour of classroom time and an hour of range time, and wow..the first time i shot i was nervous as hell..but after the first time..it was so much fun!! now we go shooting at least twice a month, i'd like to go more tho.

i dont understand why guns are demonized so much, or why so many women seem to hate them. being a woman and a past victim of violence, i made a decision long ago that no one was ever going to victimize me again. if i need a gun to keep myself safer then i'll get one. there are plenty of documented cases of women using a gun to save themselves from an attacker. the cops are NOT always around when you need them.
 
Easy to say but....

I like the booty, and the Ladies in general. I am currently invilved with an anti, the daughter of San Fransisco hippies, but I think Im making progresss. I belive that people are generally the same, no matter what the era (no offense, older peeps), and the consensus is to lay it out early. Its funny that women will pick what "to work on", but will generally stay away from your "deal breakers". Sigh, and the dance continues.
DAVO


P.S.-Mods I mean no disrespect...
P.s.s-I dont wanna be 40 and divorced!
 
Wow. Does she "let" you have your nads? Or are they up on the mantle in a jar?

The man is the head of the household. Period.

If you choose not to be all you have done is left a vacancy in that position to be filled by such nonsense.

As the head you have the responsibility to find out what the woman's issue is with guns, confront those issues, and then calmly explain your position on your responsibility to protect her as well as yourself.

Then explain you will own guns.

Then let the chips fall where they may.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top