My new girlfriend HATES GUNS!
- Thread starter peacefuljeffrey
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Strings
Member
>Mine's great in the sack, but I'm missing out in this respect.<
Ok... understand something right up front: marriage is a legal contract to have less sex. Sex should be nothing more than a pleasant occassional recreation, and form of bonding. Good sex has NO bearing on a good relationship. Especially where such a fundamental difference of opinion rears it's head...
Take some time, try teaching her. Do NOT co-habitate unless she changes her mind about guns. And if, in a reasonable amount of time, no progress has been made: EJECT EJECT EJECT!!!
Ok... understand something right up front: marriage is a legal contract to have less sex. Sex should be nothing more than a pleasant occassional recreation, and form of bonding. Good sex has NO bearing on a good relationship. Especially where such a fundamental difference of opinion rears it's head...
Take some time, try teaching her. Do NOT co-habitate unless she changes her mind about guns. And if, in a reasonable amount of time, no progress has been made: EJECT EJECT EJECT!!!
David W. Gay
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- 119
In the end
I'm with the "let her go" crowd - it'll never work.
However, keep this in mind:
Some day, many years from now, she'll be walking down the road with whom-ever she has chosen to spend her days, and, in the back of her mind, she'll realize what a mistake she'd made about you, and wonder why she'd let you go.
Know that, but forget her now, and move on.
Cheers - and Carry on!
PS: Oh, and the unfortunate irony of her eventual realization, is that it will never occur if you stay together.
I'm with the "let her go" crowd - it'll never work.
However, keep this in mind:
Some day, many years from now, she'll be walking down the road with whom-ever she has chosen to spend her days, and, in the back of her mind, she'll realize what a mistake she'd made about you, and wonder why she'd let you go.
Know that, but forget her now, and move on.
Cheers - and Carry on!
PS: Oh, and the unfortunate irony of her eventual realization, is that it will never occur if you stay together.
berettashotgun
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- May 8, 2005
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- 1,149
Holy Crap
You got your hands full, brother. Been married 2x, going on a third now. 2x strikeout champ isn't gonna' offer batting advice. This one loves guns- but doesn't REALLY like to hunt, something to do with the "humane society" emblazoned coffee mug
in the cupboard tipped me off to that fact. GOOD LUCK.
You got your hands full, brother. Been married 2x, going on a third now. 2x strikeout champ isn't gonna' offer batting advice. This one loves guns- but doesn't REALLY like to hunt, something to do with the "humane society" emblazoned coffee mug
in the cupboard tipped me off to that fact. GOOD LUCK.stevelyn
Member
Yesterday would be a good time to implement your escape plan. 
There are fundamental differences in your core values that aren't going to be reconcilled by investing more wasted time in the relationship. From the sound of her reaction to the SwissTool there's also some mental issues in need of therapy and probably a couple prescriptions. I can't see how you are possibly going to convert her. Leopards don't lose their spots and without critical thinking skills this one isn't likely to either.
Life is short. Women are replaceable. Continuing this "relationship" is setting you up for longterm financial, legal and emotional misery.
There are fundamental differences in your core values that aren't going to be reconcilled by investing more wasted time in the relationship. From the sound of her reaction to the SwissTool there's also some mental issues in need of therapy and probably a couple prescriptions. I can't see how you are possibly going to convert her. Leopards don't lose their spots and without critical thinking skills this one isn't likely to either. Life is short. Women are replaceable. Continuing this "relationship" is setting you up for longterm financial, legal and emotional misery.
Don't worry about your girl not liking guns. My wife hates guns, and told me flat out she wasn't going to have any guns in the house.
You know what? I went out and bought all the guns I want and put them in a gun safe in my house. She wasn't happy but she respects that I'm a man and have an interest in firearms.
You know what else? Every time we are at a stoplight and some weirdo staggers by talking to his "invisible friend" and shouting, she looks at me like "you've got protection, right?"
Most women don't like guns because they are scared of them, so I would find it unusual if she did like them.
The problem that the others here are alluding to when they say dump her, is that they are afraid YOU aren't the man SHE is looking for. I don't think it has anything to do with her being a liberal. If she is looking for an ultra- sensitive "fem-man" who thinks that men and women think the same and want the same things then you are looking at a lifetime of pain if you try to fit her mold.
You know what? I went out and bought all the guns I want and put them in a gun safe in my house. She wasn't happy but she respects that I'm a man and have an interest in firearms.
You know what else? Every time we are at a stoplight and some weirdo staggers by talking to his "invisible friend" and shouting, she looks at me like "you've got protection, right?"
Most women don't like guns because they are scared of them, so I would find it unusual if she did like them.
The problem that the others here are alluding to when they say dump her, is that they are afraid YOU aren't the man SHE is looking for. I don't think it has anything to do with her being a liberal. If she is looking for an ultra- sensitive "fem-man" who thinks that men and women think the same and want the same things then you are looking at a lifetime of pain if you try to fit her mold.
Sean Smith
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- Dec 28, 2002
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- 4,925
My biggest suggestion is simply this: don't compromise on things that are a matter of principle to you.
Andrew Rothman
Member
Ironically, the song itself was penned and sung by a major Lefty handwringer, Paul Simon.
Paul Simon Helps Kerry Raise $1 Mill
We now return you to your normally scheduled thread.
By the way, how long have you known this young lady with whom you are so much in love and in bed?
sturmruger
Member
I am getting in kind of late on this one, but I think you should stay with her. Give it some time it is 100% possible to change her opinion in the next year. Don't go after her all at once take it very slow.
I see that you are a NRA member. Start cutting out all of the Armed Citizen columns and put them in a folder in the bathroom. Women dont' like to admit to reading in there but they do. If she is like 99% of Americans she doesn't ever hear about the good stories where a gun saves the day.
Slightly OT. Hunter Rose I don't think all married persons are getting laid less, I know I am getting laid a whole lot more then my single budds.
I see that you are a NRA member. Start cutting out all of the Armed Citizen columns and put them in a folder in the bathroom. Women dont' like to admit to reading in there but they do. If she is like 99% of Americans she doesn't ever hear about the good stories where a gun saves the day.
Slightly OT. Hunter Rose I don't think all married persons are getting laid less, I know I am getting laid a whole lot more then my single budds.
Hi Matt-
There is no doubt about Paul Simon's truly pathetic political sentiments. It sounded like PeacefulJeffrey needed about fifty suggestions on what to do with his deteriorating relationship and those lyrics seemed apropos.
~ Blue Jays ~
There is no doubt about Paul Simon's truly pathetic political sentiments. It sounded like PeacefulJeffrey needed about fifty suggestions on what to do with his deteriorating relationship and those lyrics seemed apropos.
~ Blue Jays ~
2nd Amendment
member
With my first marriage I believed this. It was a lousy 18 months.
With my second marriage all I can say is you gotta be kidding me?! It's been an exhausting but terribly fun 12 years.
I've come to the conclusion that dating is the equivalent of throwing your money out the window while pounding yourself in the groin. In fact, the latter might be preferable; either way you end up broke and in agony, but in the latter case, you can decide when to make the pain end.
buzz. Dating certainly can be like that. I look at it this way. If I have a good time great. If I have a bad time, hopefully I learned something from it.
If I had a Great time, she will break up with me soon.
Dating stinks buy more guns.
Hey I need a new HiPower to get over my girl. I think I'll go buy one today even.
Feeling better all ready
PS. Dump the girl. One thing I have learned is that wanting to people to change for you will only lead to disappoint.
If I had a Great time, she will break up with me soon.
Dating stinks buy more guns.
Hey I need a new HiPower to get over my girl. I think I'll go buy one today even.
Feeling better all ready
PS. Dump the girl. One thing I have learned is that wanting to people to change for you will only lead to disappoint.
Stauble
Member
quote:
tell her that if she was truly "pro-choice" then you would have the right to choose whether or not you can own a gun or carry it.
that she is extremely pro-choice
tell her that if she was truly "pro-choice" then you would have the right to choose whether or not you can own a gun or carry it.
Strings
Member
huh... seems that, everyone I know, it's worked out to less sex. Did for Spoon and I: of course, that's mostly just timing, as her back problems have gotten worse since we got married...
Point I was making was that sex isn't the be-all end-all of a relationship. That, in my mind, it shouldn't even be a major consideration. So the line "she's great in the sack" should have no relevance. Too many guys make THAT mistake...
Point I was making was that sex isn't the be-all end-all of a relationship. That, in my mind, it shouldn't even be a major consideration. So the line "she's great in the sack" should have no relevance. Too many guys make THAT mistake...
mmike87
Member
There is nowhere good that this relationship can go unless you're willing to give up your guns.
Find a new girlfriend. My wife is not a shooter, and doesn't particularly like shooting at all, but she's not anti-gun in anyway.
As soon as someone tells me that they would have trouble being around me for anything that I do, they are gone.
If you said something like that to her, y'all would end up on Oprah in an episode about evil men who try and change women or some BS like that.
Find a new girlfriend. My wife is not a shooter, and doesn't particularly like shooting at all, but she's not anti-gun in anyway.
As soon as someone tells me that they would have trouble being around me for anything that I do, they are gone.
If you said something like that to her, y'all would end up on Oprah in an episode about evil men who try and change women or some BS like that.
Be prepared for friction and ultimatums when you get married, then expect her to get a restraining order after you divorce and you lose your guns, but before you even get as far as marriage, I bet she'll still pull something and accuse you of domestic "abuse" and there go your guns. Have a nice life.
Tom Servo
Member
I've been in this spot. First date was an impromptu thing, so I didn't have a chance to work it into conversation. Second date, and she started gushing about Michael Moore and how bad guns were. She looked at me as if to say, "Right?" I hesitated and said, "look, I own several guns. I frequently carry, and I think it's very important that I do so." She looked at me like I was the Spawn of Satan and excused herself. That was the end of it.
I sometimes find myself around liberal types, and it never fails to amaze me how such supposedly "open-minded" and "intellectual" they claim to be, even though they're the most lock-step, conformist, closed-minded individuals on the planet. Personally, I can't respect anyone like that. I want someone who can think for themselves. There are some folks out there with real reasons for anti-gun bias, but most antis are just bigots in well-coordinated clothing.
This is the capsule-lecture I give to the antis I run across:
For me, guns aren't just a hobby. They're a necessary survival tool and a symbol of freedom. I come from a huge family that traces its history back to the 4th Crusade. 80% of that was wiped out by Hitler, another 10% by Stalin afterwards. I've been to the Middle East and Eastern Europe. Contrary to what you may think, the rest of the world is not like the United States but with fewer television channels. Much of it is ugly, violent and very dangerous. The same historical patterns can happen anywhere, even here. I have the Constitutional right as well as a government license for my guns, and up until now, you've assumed that I'm a calm and rational person. So what just changed when I told you I keep and carry guns?
There are lots of misinformed folks out there who will come around after reasoned argument, but your GF doesn't sound like one of them. My sister's a college professor, and trust me, her friends are all like this. They won't change, and they get REALLY hostile when you chink away at their well-manicured opinions with facts. She's brought a few of them over to my place for dinner before, and several times, I've found myself saying, "well, this is my house, and I feel the need to protect it. The guns are secured, but if you're still uncomfortable, sorry." They look at me like I've just passed gas or something.
Funny thing is, several of these people have been mugged at gunpoint. :banghead:
I'm not going to go all Dr. Phil here, but from my own experience, this isn't the kind of person I'd respect, and if I don't respect someone, that's it. She'll try to gradually "convert" you, but she'll never give an inch herself. It'll only be a steadily more abrasive spiral. There are open-minded folks out there. It just takes time.
I sometimes find myself around liberal types, and it never fails to amaze me how such supposedly "open-minded" and "intellectual" they claim to be, even though they're the most lock-step, conformist, closed-minded individuals on the planet. Personally, I can't respect anyone like that. I want someone who can think for themselves. There are some folks out there with real reasons for anti-gun bias, but most antis are just bigots in well-coordinated clothing.
This is the capsule-lecture I give to the antis I run across:
For me, guns aren't just a hobby. They're a necessary survival tool and a symbol of freedom. I come from a huge family that traces its history back to the 4th Crusade. 80% of that was wiped out by Hitler, another 10% by Stalin afterwards. I've been to the Middle East and Eastern Europe. Contrary to what you may think, the rest of the world is not like the United States but with fewer television channels. Much of it is ugly, violent and very dangerous. The same historical patterns can happen anywhere, even here. I have the Constitutional right as well as a government license for my guns, and up until now, you've assumed that I'm a calm and rational person. So what just changed when I told you I keep and carry guns?
There are lots of misinformed folks out there who will come around after reasoned argument, but your GF doesn't sound like one of them. My sister's a college professor, and trust me, her friends are all like this. They won't change, and they get REALLY hostile when you chink away at their well-manicured opinions with facts. She's brought a few of them over to my place for dinner before, and several times, I've found myself saying, "well, this is my house, and I feel the need to protect it. The guns are secured, but if you're still uncomfortable, sorry." They look at me like I've just passed gas or something.
Funny thing is, several of these people have been mugged at gunpoint. :banghead:
I'm not going to go all Dr. Phil here, but from my own experience, this isn't the kind of person I'd respect, and if I don't respect someone, that's it. She'll try to gradually "convert" you, but she'll never give an inch herself. It'll only be a steadily more abrasive spiral. There are open-minded folks out there. It just takes time.
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