Dating girlfriends and guns

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florida1098 wrote,
I say if you need advise about a girlfriend from people you don't know and post your problem on the web for anyone to see it should come down to the following, just in my opinion
you should not own a gun
you should not have a girlfriend
alot of people would probably be safer if you did not have a gun
just my opinion
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That's harsh but freakin' hilarious.
 
If you cannot be yourself around her (i.e. concealing your hobby would not be being yourself), then she's probly not the one you want to be with long-term. She doesn't have to be into guns, but it would be tough to be in a compatible relationship if she didn't tolerate them at all. I wouldn't flaunt it and try to scare her off, but don't keep it a secret either.
 
StephenT said:
As far as filtering people as pro-gun or anti-gun, I don't think such a feature exists in eHarmony. Besides, I don't really care if she's "into guns". I can always influence her thinking with a visit to the range if she agrees with the idea...
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I sincerely hope you were joking with that statement, because if not -- the only person you're fooling is yourself. First, if she's an anti you are not -- repeat NOT -- going to influence her. Secondly, on a moral equivalency level, if you think you have a right to "influence her thinking" toward guns, then you have to grant that she also has an equal right to influence your thinking away from guns.

Which sounds like a great setup for a relationship based on arguing about guns. Life is too short to waste it like that.
 
Why not ask for advice on an internet forum? You may not get serious answers but your also less likely to get biased answers from people who don't know you.
It takes courage to stand up and say "I need help, because I do not understand." I consider this to be a great measure of character if a person is willing to say they need help because they lack experience. The worst that can happen is that a bunch of people you don't know and will probably never meet make fun of you.
 
Well, since you're in Houston, you shouldn't have a problem, I think. Your only problem is that you have so many guns. Even I think you're unusual.


All men in Texas have at least a gun or two. Most girls will be interested in shooting your guns just for fun. After which, they'll start to want their own.


The 100+ guns things puts you in a different category, though. You don't just have some guns like everybody else. You're a gun collector.


I suspect I wouldn't mention the giant collection until you have to. By then, she'll know whether she likes you or not so it'll mainly be a calculation in her head of how much money per year you'll be spending on guns if you get married (hint: she'll try to negotiate you down; after the kids, forget about it).
 
When I was dating a girl that I was matched up with by some friends of both of ours I mentioned that I had a gun and that I carried it on about our third or fourth phone conversation (before we had even gone on a blind date). That way, she had a better idea of my personality, and she wasn't thinking she was about to go on a date with some armed crazy person.

I showed her my gun on our first date, before we went anywhere and I made sure she was comfortable with it. I explained all my reasons for carrying and asked how she felt about it.

She told me it made her feel safe. I offered to take her shooting since she had never been before, but it didnt end up doing it.

Be open and honest about it, but don't let it be one of the first thing you talk about. Let her get to know you and get a feel for your personality, and she shouldn't have a problem with it.
 
IMO don't worry about guns until you decide you like her enough for it to matter. Unless she extremly anti-gun thats not something you should base a relationship on, it's just a cherry on top.

FWIW I found my gun loving fiance on the website justsayhi.com. It is free and I manged to score 15+ dates before I found the right one.
 
You will be a lot happier if you just scare them away early and get it over with!!!

Keep the ones that hang around.

I was the same way with motorcycles.

I always took them for a ride right away...if they don't like it...see ya!

I told my (now 16 year) wife that I had lost more women than I kept that way.

Ric
 
I'm also an avid gun owner with a collection of 100+ guns. I'm concerned that my "hobby" may scare away any prospective girlfriends.
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The way I see it you have two basic choices.
1) Eliminate the source of concern (get rid of all the guns).
2) Be your real self and let a compatible person find you.

I will never EVER understand the thought process that causes people to search for a compatible mate, lie or in other ways misrepresent themselves, and then be all surprised when it doesn't work out down the road.

There is someone for everyone and the search may be a pain in the butt, but you'll never EVER succeed if the search is based on a false premise.
 
If EHarmony works as advertised (and I have seen a few examples first hand), you may be surprised to find that their matching algorithm didn't match you with any anti-gun women.
 
My now wife actually asked me why I didnt carry a gun more often.

I told her on the second date that I enjoyed shooting. Soon after that she asked me about carrying.

Turned out her mom and dad both carry.
Her CCW is on the way.
 
...decided to give eHarmony a try this week. I'm also an avid gun owner with a collection of 100+ guns. I'm concerned that my "hobby" may scare away any prospective girlfriends.
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Isn't E-Harmony supposed to match you on "29 dimensions of compatibility" or something or other?
You mean gun ownership isn't one of the given 29 ?!? :what:
 
I told the girlfriend that I shoot guns. Now my wife of 24 years. If she would have been gun shy, afraid of guns, did not want them around, I would have found one that was not afraid of guns.
 
I find this thread amusing in the sense of how times have change, how geographic locations differ, or how naive I was. I am not sure which is the biggest factor.

I started dating my wife 18 years ago. So maybe times have changed. It was in southestern Tennessee. So maybe geographic locations differ. I never dreamed that real women were fanatically opposed to gun ownership. Maybe I was just naive.

On our second date, I mentioned hunting or guns,and was appalled to find that she had never shot a gun. Our next date remedied that situation. I am not sure that there is any correlation, but later that night was the first time we kissed. It never dawned on me that there was a person that had not shot a gun that would not want to.:rolleyes: Well it worked out just fine, except that everytime I buy a new rimfire, it makes its way to the HER side of the safe.

I do love that girl!

Off topic:

I am also surprised by how many folks seem to be using online dating services. In many ways it makes an enormous amount of sense.
 
I've been dating the same girl for 2.5 years now, and if I may say so, I think my dating years may be over :) She's known I carry since we started dating. I've offered to take her to the range before, and she's politely declined. One night a while back, we were laying in bed one night, and she just out of the blue said "I'm glad you have a gun". I smiled. Since then, she's agreed to at least learn how to operate my guns when I get back from Honduras. Here's to hoping she gets hooked :)
 
Mine had never had any first hand contact with the firearms or even outdoor world. First I got her into fishing, then got her familiar with the fact that I hunt, then bought her a bow, started keeping a couple of my firearms under the bed for home defense, then got her shooting a few months ago. It's been slow going but I think it's definitely something that's stuck. I got her a nice .22 and .30-30 which she's pretty good with, the latter of which she has for home defense.

Personally if I were dating again I'd want nothing to do with a girl who's unfamiliar with firearms. Too much trouble and it tells me a lot about her which I generally don't like.
 
XD Fan wrote,
I never dreamed that real women were fanatically opposed to gun ownership.
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Well, there's Hillary. See her record. She's terrified of all guns.

Oops, never mind. Hillary doesn't have anything to do with a real woman. However, a lot of women sure do like her...
 
The second date with my GF was at a range. I figure I should get it out of the way early in the relationship and show her that I'm not a wack-job. As a bonus, she enjoyed herself. and wants to go again.
 
On your first date, stare intensely into her eyes and wisper (like the guy from Futureweapons) "I have guns......lots of guns."

Honestly, if she wispered back, "I do, too." I'd be scared.
 
Best thing to do IMO is let it be known up front. You will only resent her later if you have to give up the hobby completely because it makes her uncomfortable.

jm
 
Ric said:
I told my (now 16 year) wife that I had lost more women than I kept that way.
Click to expand...
So, like ... how many did you actually keep?

And does your wife know about them? Do you keep them in windowless basements like that dude in Austria?
 
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